honestly ; bts (yoongi + jungkook)

01. lair

Yoongi looked at the boy that was standing in front of him, as pitiful-looking as the dead trees in winter. His own dark eyes reflected a hint of unsatisfactory and disappointment, along with anger, as his look hardened into a glare. He huffed as he took the lollipop out of his mouth for a moment in one frustrated move. "What do you want?" He snapped.

Jungkook gripped the edge of his clothes as he continued to look down, avoiding the other's eyes. There was a moment of silence and the air between them hung heavily in a dense aura of discomfort. "Y-You..." He finaly mumbled before he paused and left his sentence short, as if he really didn't want to talk at the moment.

Despite the fury boiling in his heart, Yoongi's heart shattered at the sight of him. He couldn't stand to see Jungkook sad and scared and broken like this. You're a jerk yoongi. You've hurt him again without realizing . He loved him. Jeon Jungkook. Yoongi never met someone who fit with him so well. As if he was the missing piece of the puzzle called his life. He was just so right. So beautiful, so talented, so... So perfect. 

But that was all nice and a fantasy. A dream. A fragment of imagination. Because in truth.. In reality, he can't be with him.. I'm a monster. I can't be with him. I'll only hurt him more because that's all I seem to ever do.. all I can ever do. He sighed as he tried to maintain his intimidating and angry ferocity. "Spill it or I'm leaving. I have class in half an hour and I'm about to go eat. Unlike you, I actually need to eat."

"Why are you avoiding me?!" Jungkook blurted out finally as Yoongi threatened to leave with a gesture of the moving of his legs. "Do you- Do you really hate me Yoongi?"

Yoongi tightened his jaws as he frowned more, giving him an annoyed stare as he took in a sharp breath that indicated and matched his seemingly annoyed emotion to the moment. Because I love you!! But I don't deserve an angel like you! I'm a monster- a devil! You can't be with me! You'll only end up getting hurt. Jeon Jungkook, I love you ok!  Yoongi screamed in the silence of his conflicted mind. However he didn't let a word out from his lips as he thought of his words carefully. And his chosen words were, "You're wasting your time Jungkook..."

"Did I do something wrong? Yoongi please tell me."

"No. I've been busy. Leave me alone."

"But clearly you're mad at me."

"Heck off! I'm not mad at you."

"You are! Look at yourself."

Yoongi's fake anger was starting to get mixed upon his real emotions for Jungkook. With one last attempt he let out a mocking scoff and popped his lollipop back in his mouth. "You're wasting my time. Get lost."

"Yoongi-" Jungkook reached out in a smooth skip and stretch and he grabbed Yoongi's sleeve as the other was about to turn and head his way, stopping him from leaving. "I'm sorry."

Yoongi physically forced himself to resist turning to look at the boy clutching his sleeve. He had to. At the moment, tears were beginning to form in his dark cold eyes. He himself was breaking. Like glass he was shattering into a million of pieces. If took a glance at Jungkook he'd really break. Fuck you Jungkook. I want you so bad but I cant.

With a sharp jerk of pure strength, Yoongi coldly snatched his arm back. "I don't know what you're apologizing for. You did nothing wrong. Stop bothering me. I have to go, so be on your merry way." He replied coldly, controlling his shaky voice well beneath his lips.

He left Jungkook speechless in the courtyard. The poor boy was probably confused. But it's better this way.. It'll hurt less if it's covered up by lies. Yoongi sighed as he headed back to the building.