lost (delena fanfiction after 5x22)

The grave

-chapter 2-

Stefan's POV

I spent all night listening To elena crying her heart out. I wanted to comfort her but she kept her door locked the whole time. I could hear the pain she was in, the heart break. but there was nothing I could do but just wait until she opened her door. I however was containing my emotions they were building up inside of me like a time bomb ready to explode. Caroline came back to the house with me and made sure I wouldn't do anything stupid. she made sure I wouldn't turn my humanity off. I had to keep strong for elena, she kept telling me. I agreed with her but it was hard to I just wanted to lash out. I lost my brother and there was nothing I could do about it .the other side was destroyed so I couldn't get him back. he was gone forever.

I walked into the boarding house library after taking a few blood bags up, and putting them outside Damon's room where elena was hiding. I knew it was only too long until she would switch it off. she wasn't strong enough to handle this. unfortunately today is the day we were going to bury them damon and have a memorial for Bonnie as we didn't have her corpses. I sat down on the sofa with caroline, ric, Jeremy, tyler and matt. It was ten in the morning and everyone was dressed in black suits and ties and Caroline was in a little black dress. I asked elena if she was going to come out but she didn't answer. Caroline came up to me and hugged me. "is she coming ?" she asked pulling away. I shock my head. everyone got up and we all headed to the cemetery and found the spot where we were going to bury damon. I could feel my eyes welling up as I saw the freshly dug grave which I knew had my brother in it. a single tear rolled down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away. I know he wasn't the best brother in the world at all times but there were times he was. We had a tree stump memorial for Bonnie like we did before next to where damon laid. how ironic I thought. they hated each other but they also died together. everyone stood there in silence. when I heard footsteps coming up from behind me and there stood in a black knee length dress and smudged make up was elena.

Elena's POV

My eyes were sore, I had Been crying all night non stop I hadn't slept.I just lay there on the bed of mine and Damon's room, I was curled up in a ball hugging one of his shirts. his shirt was now creased from how tight I had held it. I never wanted to let go. the smell of it made me think he was still here. but then reality sunk in and I remembered he was. Dead.

I was starving but I didn't want to face anyone. Because they would all try and comfort me, tell me it's okay. so I stayed tucked up in a ball under the covers. the bed never felt so empty. I've never felt so empty or alone. I hugged his pillow and rolled over onto his side. I sobbed into the pillow, "you lied to me damon!" I knew he couldn't hear me because he wasn't here but I figured if I pretended to talk to him I wouldn't feel so alone.

I zoned into the talking downstairs. everyone was here. I knew they were burying him today and having a memorial for h and Bonnie. I wanted to go but facing them or leaving this room seemed too hard. stefan came up earlier along with ric and Jeremy all trying to persuade me to come. I hadn't answered any of them. none of them were enough to comfort me I needed damon. I needed to snuggle into the crock of his neck and let him stroke my hair as I told him all my problems. he was the one who was always there for me, always the saviour, rescuer but who was there for him? I knew I needed to go to the funeral and pay my respects but how could I look at a tree stump memorial for my best friend again! Or worse a freshly dug grave of the man I love. but he wouldn't of wanted me to mope around like this. why did Bonnie bring me back. The reason I got into that car with him is because I was going to die with him, I wasn't going to come back if he didn't I wanted to stay with him. now he's gone. he's dead. I remember him joking that he wanted me to throw his ashes over Wickery bridge, I bet he never imagined he would die like he did. all night I had been lying on the bed playing through my memories of us, damon and I. from the first time we met on Wickery bridge, the first time I bumped into him in the boarding house. the first time he told me he loved me, our first kiss. but the one that stuck out most was the time he said he would never leave me. or yesterday when he said he promised he would come back to me well that was a lie.