The Things We Left Behind | Lisa Cimorelli

Chapter 8

A/N - trigger warning!

Lauren's POV:

As I walk into my science class, the second period of the day. I see Michaela and Ryan talking at their separate desks. I really think she likes him, I don't mind though. I mean, I don't really know him but she's been hanging out with him a lot lately and well, she's my only friend here so I guess you could say I'm a bit jealous.

"Hey Lauren," Michaela says as she sees me walking over to them.

"Hey Lauren," Ryan says blankly. I guess he's annoyed that I interrupted their moment or something.

"Hey guys," I say back and take my seat next to Michaela.

"Um, Lauren can I talk to you after this class?" Michaela whispers into my ear and I nod in a response. The door then opens, cutting me from my thoughts as the teacher enters the room and we begin with the lesson.

The class eventually ends and I make my way out of the class with Michaela following. Thankfully, I had a free period after this and so did she.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" I ask her as she leads me outside and we sit outside on the grass.

"I know you saw my tattoo on my wrist," She starts and I look at her, wondering where she is going with this. She rolls up her jacket sleeve and points to the tattoo that she was talking about, I nod at her.

"Yea, sorry about that I didn't mea-," I'm cut off by Michaela who is shaking her head sideways.

"It's okay. I shouldn't have hid it. I guess I believe that if no one sees it, it's not there and that he's not gone. It's stupid I know but," Michaela trails off.

"No, it's not stupid at all. What happened?" I say trying to sound sympathetic but sweet and caring at the same time. It reminds me of Lisa, how I felt when she was in a coma for those years, how I felt so alone like no one was there for me to talk to even though there was.

"My b-brother," She says, her voice cracking. I give her a small smile and reach over to give her a sideways hug.

"Don't worry," I say to her calmly and try to get her to calm down as she begins to cry into my shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask as I pull away from our hug and face her, her eyes were red and swollen and she looked like she hadn't slept in days.

"No, but I need too. I haven't talked to anyone about it." She says and I nod, motioning for her to continue.

"Well, my brother was in a car accident and he didn't make it. It was like three years ago and I still haven't moved on. He is the reason why I moved schools, I guess I couldn't take all the gossip about me and him, or the looks people would give me. I miss him so much," She says crying and stuttering every so often. This situation really reminds me of Lisa. I wonder how she feels. She must feel terrible.

"I'm so sorry Michaela, my sister was in a coma from a crash too. She woke up last week." I say and give her a sympathetic smile. She nods as if to say it's okay,

"I know, as soon as you said that I nearly had a panic attack, it bought me memories of my brother. I'm sorry." She says and I shake my head,

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bought it up. Gosh, I'm such an awful person." I say looking down. She doesn't say anything but brings me into a tight hug. It feels so nice to have someone to talk to, someone who isn't apart of my family and that I don't think blames me.

"So your tattoo?" I say looking at it as I pull away and glance at the one on her wrist.

"824, the day my brother died, the 24th of August." She says calmly. Memories circle around my head and I suddenly feel like I can't breathe. I'm suddenly snapped back into reality when Michaela snaps her fingers in front of my face.

"You okay?" She asks me kindly.

It was probably a coincident right? I mean, her brother couldn't have possibly crashed the truck that crashed into my sister who put her in this coma. Don't be dumb Lauren, there's lots of people who drive that could have crashed into her.

"Yea," I say and smile. Deciding not to say anything about the situation and convince myself that this incident is not related and that my friends brother didn't hurt my sister.

We head back to class as we hear the bell ring. My brain won't stop over flowing with thoughts about Michaela's brother and my sister.

*

Amy's POV:

I can't believe Lisa doesn't remember me, we were such good friends when we were little. I can't lie that I'm depressed about this situation. I'm so happy she's awake but I would be better if she remembered me too. I partially blame myself for what happened to Lisa which is why I'm so sad about Lisa not remembering me. I guess it was all my fault. I guess I am to blame.

The talk with Christina and Dani helped a bit I guess, it helped me to look at the brighter side of this. That Lisa is awake and healthy. But am I? I mean I'm awake, but am I healthy? Ever since Lisa woke up I've been nothing but paranoid and the slightest memory of me and Lisa could either send me spiralling into a panic attack or even something more. The fact that she doesn't remember me has really took an impact on my life.

Will she ever remember me? What if she doesn't? What will happen?

I sigh to myself and bury my face into my hands, I'm sitting on my bed in my shared room and thinking about my life and Lisa.

I remembered something I used to do when Lisa was in her coma, when Lauren couldn't stop crying and our parents wouldn't come out of their room. Something that I wasn't proud of at all, yet it helped me to relieve my pain. The pain of Lisa and her in a coma.

I lift up my sleeve to reveal the scars on my wrist, I trace my finger over them, wincing in pain. Most of them have scabbed up because it's been quite a while since I've done it. Ever since Kath walked in on me, I convinced her it was nothing and she seemed to believe me and let it go. Thank God for that.

I make my way into the bathroom, look around for my razor or anyone's actually. I rip the cap off in a matter of seconds and before I could process what I was about to do, I did it.

I cut my left wrist, it was like an addiction and this was my drug. I couldn't stop myself. I wince from the pain as I sit on the floor and bury myself into my hands, trying to escape from the world. This is all my fault. If I didn't have a fight with Lisa a few hours before her accident this may have never happened. I said things I didn't mean. I wish I could go back and change them. I'm such a selfish person.

I cry into my hands until the blood from my wrist is dry and I stand up to clear the bathroom. As soon as it doesn't look like anyone has been in here, I make my way into my room, wiping my eyes and dive into my bed. I soon fall asleep.

Maybe I'm being paranoid. Maybe I'm over reacting. Maybe she'll remember me tomorrow. Or maybe, maybe I need help and I need Lisa to remember me more than anything. Lisa possibly waking up from the coma was the only thing keeping me from killing myself and now she doesn't even remember me. We were really close and now, it doesn't mean anything to her. It feels like the world has come crashing down on me.

I think I need help.

-

- a/N - Hey guys!
Sorry for the short chapter and it's kind of just a filler.
What do you think about Michaela's brother and Lisa's accident happening on the same day?
let me know x

thanks for reading x ilya 💜