Haze

My body lays numb, I can't feel anything, no pain, no happiness. My body is too weak to move, my eyes too heavy to open, I'm stuck inside my mind just the deep black void shows.

I push everything I have in me to move something, my feet let out a small twitch, I panic I can't fall back into this daze I'm fighting to open my eyes, my eyes crack and twitch as it's brought with a shining hard light, my legs bolt like waking out of an nightmare.
There's voices and noise, I don't know what of, just muffled noises.
My eyes now blurred but open, it's bright, there's light and people, people around me. This was just a nightmare, right? Am I dead? I'm so sorry. I was hurting, so I just put more pain on myself I just wanted to go, am I gone? I see him, no it can't be him, why is he here? I must be dead.He doesn't see me, he's not looking, heh he never did but that's just silly little him off in his mind, though he isn't okay.
I try to move my arm to him, there's others in the room but I need him to notice me. My arm twitches but is much too weak, I can't make a noise I am screaming for him but nothing.
Someone in the room notices me, obvisiously causing everyone to turn to me, including him. My jaw opens, still nothing. I pull my arm out again it moves but only from the elbow. He has tears in his eyes, why is he crying? This wasn't his fault, I can't hear him but I read his soft lips saying "I'm so sorry" I want to speak, I can't, all I want to say is I love him, I want to be held, this is just a nightmare anyway it's not real. Tears are falling from my eyes, almost in pools it just makes my vision more blurred. He is too scared to touch me, he thinks he'll hurt me again, no. I need his warmth I want him to grab my hand I want him to kiss me. I shouldn't have done this, so stupid of me... I shouldn't have taken that many, I only wanted to skip time. Time is so slow. Maybe I can be an angel. I slip back into the daze.