Destin [ON HOLD]

T H I R T E E N

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Taehyung's POV.

"CAN YOU NOT FUCKING SING?"

I cower back in my seat, feeling my eyes become teary as soon as he raises his voice.

Yoongi sighs, cursing as he rubs his forehead with the pads of his fingers.

"Fuck, I can't fucking do this."he mutters, burrowing his face into his hands.

The other members are silent all seated on individual chairs. Jungkook has put on an emotionless facade as he watches Yoongi, never once letting his eyes stray towards me.

He doesn't care.

Who am I kidding? He never did in the first place. It was all an act. I bet he's internally laughing at the moment.

But at the moment I don't care if Jungkook has faked his nice act because Yoongi is mad.

And when Yoongi is made then it is wise to stay as far away from him.

But what makes it worse is that I am at the receiving end of his fury.

"I'm sorry, hyung."I choked out, bowing my head to avoid the curious stares I am getting.

Hoseok rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over my his chest as he looks at me with hooded eyes,"We're getting a bit sick of hearing you say that all the time, ain't that right guys?"

Shouts of agreement ring through the group. Even Jungkook is nodding but there is a faraway look in his eyes.

He doesn't care.

I clench my fists, until beads of red appear. My jaw is clenched so tightly that it begins to hurt and my eyes are stinging with unshed tears that we're begging to fall.

"Just repeat the damn line."Yoongi huffs, obviously restraining himself from lashing out.

I look up at him with shocked eyes. Yoongi was never the one to be patient nor caring and his sudden change of attitude surprises me.

"T-Thank you."

He rolls his eyes,"Whatever, just sing."

I smile lightly at him, a show of gratitude.

He only scowls heavily on return.

Namjoon glares at me from where he sits, mumbling loudly for the entire room to hear,"Attention whore."

Jimin snickers, nodding along with Hoseok. Jin is staring attentively at his phone, his fingers bruising against the smooth screen. Yoongi is fiddling with the beat, adjusting the music and acts as though he had not heard Namjoon.

Jungkook however is smirking, grinning at Jimin as he nods in agreement.

Ouch.

I look away from the two, my vision blurry as I tru and hold in the onslaught of tears.

"3,2,1."Yoongi counts, signalling for me to begin.

I take in a deep breath, eyes still teary as I stare at my music sheet, the lyrics seeming unnatural and disfigured.

I begin to sing, my voice raspy and croaky as I try not to cry, spotting the disgusted expressions against the member's faces.

"Stop."Yoongi commands, irritation etched on his face as he puts his hand up,"Stop, just stop. You sound terrible."

I feel as though as I am getting stabbed repeatedly into my chest while a fire burns over my stomach. A mix of humiliation and disappointment at myself pools at my stomach, threatening to swallow me whole.

There is silence in the room as everyone watches Yoongi, curious for what he would do next.

"You're supposed to be a worldwide singer."he growls out dangerously,"A damn good one at that, but here you are sounding like a fucking cow giving birth to an elephant. What the hell is wrong with you?"

His words hit right home and I flinch back, tears flooding down my cheeks as I bite my lip, until blood drops on my white T-shirt just so they wouldn't hear me.

"He's right."Hoseok snarls,"I've had enough of your shit. You're weighing us down. You're dancing is shit and now your singing is too. Do you have any talent, you bitch?"

I keep my head bowed, afraid to meet his eyes. The last time I had looked Jimin in the eye when he was scolding me, I had been punched and pushed to the ground roughly because of my disrespect.

"Get out."Namjoon says, glaring ferociously as he points to the door,"Get out of here. I don't want to see your face until you work out whatever shit is going on in your life at the moment."

I am not sure whether to take him seriously. I would be constantly handed with threats of being pulled out of the group and yet it never happened so a part of me believes that he is not serious.

But his next words prove me entirely wrong.

"I mean it. I wouldn't even mind if you never turned up again. Just get the fuck out of my face."

I am sobbing, not caring if the last piece of my dignity has now slipped down the drain as I rise shakily to my feet.

"I'm sorry."I cry as I open the door, allowing of half of myself to be swallowed by the black of the other room.

"I'm so fucking sorry."

____________________________

I do not know who to call.

The dream still remains fresh at the front of my mind, taunting me with its cruel words.

V reminds me that both Chanyeol and Baekhyun only deals with me out of pity, and I don't doubt him, because he is right.

No one will ever love me, much less enjoy my presence.

I am simply a stone in their way that they are desperate to move as soon as possible.

I am thankful to have my mask tucked under my chin while I had been singing so that when I had fled from the studio, foolishly forgetting my bag and phone, no one would recognise me.

At the moment I do not want to be swarmed by fans who want autographs and photos.

It is dark as I wonder down the dim lit street lights, who threw long, slanting shadows against the rough concrete.

I am afraid to return to the dorm in fear of how Namjoon would react.

The man destroys everything he touches and I certainly wouldn't want to be the victim of his bone-crushing fingers.

It is when I am walking down a lively street, bright lamps strewn across the shop windows, do I see them.

The soft,yellow light from the restaurant hits the windows, allowing me to see its interior clearer. Colourful streamers hang from the creamy walls, careful to not touch the heads of the customers. A large water full sits in the middle of room, the water gushing down the ridges of the intricate textures, specks of water even flicking against the disgruntled people nearby.

The members are all sitting around a large table that is covered in a rich, crimson red table cloth that falls to the knees of the table. Plates and glasses are places neatly before them, still empty without food. Everyone is smiling and laughing as they joke amongst themselves.

See, they're perfectly fine without you. I bet Namjoon told you to get out so they could hang out without pissing you off. Surprised they cared enough to take in your feelings.

I nod, wholeheartedly agreeing with V even if the truth hurt terribly. I can't help but wish that they would've worried slightly. Worried about the last member who could be anywhere. Maybe in danger even.

Selfish.

But they didn't.

And that was truth of it all.

They didn't care enough.