bullet holes • s.g + c.b

chapter eleven

they were in colby's car. sam was behind the wheel so colby could catch a few more hours of sleep. they were heading back to kansas for christmas. sam promised he'd help his best friend and if starting at square one was what needed to happen then so be it.

they were almost back to their hometown and colby had basically slept the whole way there which had slightly worried sam. how late did he stay up before they left?

colby stretched in his seat and let a yawn escape his lips. as he sat up he looked around to see where he was. "kum and go?" colby's eyes shot to the drivers seat where sam was suddenly missing from, "what the fuck? sam?" he looked around outside and his nerves calmed when he saw sam inside paying for two bottled waters and couple bags of chips.

"sleeping beauty's awake." sam smiled as he closed the car door, "how was your 'nap'?"

"it was nice." an uncomfortable silence enveloped the two after colby's answer which deeply made sam fight the urge to pull over and walk away.

"nice, i guess." sam sighed when he looked over and saw colby looking out his passenger window, "we're almost back to my house. I told mom to invite your family over."

"thanks." colby mumbled. he was nervous. he hadn't spoken to his parents much since brennens' video nor was he excited to, they'd left many voicemails but he never gained the courage to call them back. he slammed back to reality when the uncomfortable silence filled the car, it felt as if the silence was engulfing him and he desperately wanted to fix it — but he didn't know how. "i'm scared." He blurted.

sam was a bit shocked by the bold and sudden statement. "why?"

"i've barely spoken to them since.. the video. last i saw or heard they're all concerned." colby shifted uncomfortably under his nerves as he looked to meet sam's gaze, "something is wrong with me and they're going to notice."

"nothing is wrong with you. there's nothing wrong with being lost, colbs." sam pulled into his driveway and shifted in his seat to face colby. "listen, i love you." sam reached out and placed his hands on his cheeks, "i love you so much. i love you, cole."

colby noticed the tears that suddenly lined his eyes but he refused to cry as sam leaned over the arm rest and engulfed him in a hug. "i love you too, samuel."

————

they walked through the door and both families were already there to greet them with smiles. "welcome home boys!" kirk hugged both boys while cindy followed.

"hi mom, dad." sam chuckled as he and colby hugged his parents back. colby's eyes traveled to his parents who nodded at him and his mom opened her welcoming arms, he might as well have run into her arms.

"it's okay. you can breathe now, cole." mrs. brock whispered to colby which only made him hug her tighter. sam watched with a crooked smile on his lips.

"dinner just started, it should be done within the next two hours. for now, you two relax you must've had a long drive." mrs. brock smiled at the two and shooed them off to relax.

"c'mon." sam intertwined his fingers with colby's as he led both of them down the all too familiar staircase, "the start of sam and colby." sam whispered as he opened the door  to the basement and they both stepped inside the small room.

colby looked around the room. fans art and posters decorated the back wall, a table placed in front of the couch. they use to film their videos in this room back when colby knew who he was, what he wanted to be, where he wanted to be. when he began figuring his feelings.

"colby?" sam's smile turned into a frown of concern as he saw the tears cascading down his boyfriends face, "colbs, cole." he walked in front of the brunet and looked into his eyes. "hey, are you okay?"

all colby could do was twist his arms around sam and bury his face into sam's shoulder, muffling the sobs that began to escape his lips. sam was a bit taken back by his action but quickly recovered and wrapped his arms around colby.

"it's okay." sam whispered as he tightened the hug around the sobbing boy, "i'm here, i'm not leaving you."