Chapter 54

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Ultrasound of Elise's babies in the mm.

Elise P.O.V.

Who would of thought that I would of been in this situation again? Fighting for not my life, but for my little one's life. Seems as if I couldn't get a break; it's like when one thing happens, something else happens not to far behind it. Finally, I thought that August and I could catch a break and be happy. However, for some odd reason nobody wanted to see us happy together.

I laid in my hospital bed with my white gown on, my lower abdomen was wrapped. Scared wasn't the word. My heart would break if the doctor told me that I lost my baby.

Looking around the room, August sat on the chair beside me with Victoria in her arms asleep. August was fast asleep too, only I was awake. My mind was full of thoughts and I couldn't seem to rest. A sigh escaped my lips as I turned over giving my back to them as I cried silently. I wanted to be strong, I wanted to have faith in God that everything was going to be okay. But I couldn't help the thoughts that wonder what if?

Just then, the doctor walked in with a clipboard. Wiping my face, I sat up and looked at him with hopeful eyes. She looked at me and gave me a warm touching smile.

"Listen, you were only in your first trimester so I don't know how this occurred." She started, "You we're actually going to have triplets but the bullet hit one of them and killed them. It's crazy because we would of expected them all to die due to scarring of the uterus. We would of thought that you would of had some kind of birth defect. But no, we of course went inside of you and took out the disease baby. However, you are going to have two healthy babies."

I didn't know how to feel about the information that she had just given me. A part of me was happy that I was still going to have my babies; however, a part of me still broken considering one still died.

"Thank you." I smiled weakly at her.

She nodded her head, "No problem ma'am, you can leave tomorrow morning. We took the bullet out of you, stitched you up, checked on the babies and your fine. I'll give you your release papers tomorrow."

As she walked out of the room, I looked over at August who had tears in his eyes. I couldn't look at him, because I know if I looked at him I would want to cry too. Lately, I've been crying too much and it time I get a grip of myself. I've been focusing so much on the negative that I was blinded by the positive aspects of it. Although one of my babies did die, I had two that I still have to take care of. Maybe this was all apart of God's plan for me, for us.

"We was gonna have triplets baby." August whimpered, "This is all my fault."

August began to cry as I looked at him. I smiled weakly at his vulnerability. However, this was kind of his fault because he didn't have to go to New York and have sex. But I couldn't place the blame on him all the way. He didn't place a gun at her head and told him to shoot me. She decided to make that choice.

"This isn't your fault August." I sighed playing with my fingers.

"Yes it is." He shook his head, "If I never slept with her, this would of never happened."

I bit my lip, thinking of how to respond to that. "Women are different from men. For most men they don't look at sex as an action of vulnerability. Sex is something that can be so beautiful, but it is men and people in general like you that makes it something it's not. Sex isn't something you do to get over someone, get a quick nut, or just for fun. It's something that is so little, that needs to be taken seriously.

"It's an action where a woman and a man connects, not only physically, but emotionally and mentally. Sex is one thing that can make a sane person turn into someone they never wished to become. In her eyes, you betrayed her and used her. Okay, maybe she didn't have respect for herself, but that didn't give you the reason to disrespect her too."

August took in what i said, "You right baby."

"This isn't your fault August, you didn't force her to shoot me. I'm not mad at you, I'm just disappointed that you didn't think before you did it. Definitely considering the situation that happened before this." I explained.

"Your right." August wiped his face.

I smiled at him as I looked over at Victoria who was curled up in a fetus position in August's arm. Her thumb was in her mouth and she slept peacefully. August had his arms wrapped around her, giving her security.

"I remember when we had such a rough start." I giggled at the memories.

August laughed, "You right. It was almost like a love hate relationship."

I kissed my teeth, "You knew from the jump you loved me."

August looked at me with a blank expression and I thought for a moment I said something wrong. I took my bottom lip into my mouth and stared at him.

"I do love you Elise." He said, "I know we dont say it often. But I just want you to know that if I had to give myself away for you, Victoria, or the babies to live, I will."

"I love you too August." I smiled.

We never said I love you often, but our actions spoke louder than our words. I never expected to fall so deeply in love with August, and I'm pretty sure he thought the same thing. I was so damaged, so hurt, so broken, that I vowed that I would never fall in love again. Relationships were never what they seemed and were built off of hurt and pain. However, August showed me different, even if it was on a different aspect. He taught me that real love never die and it couldn't be denied. That a relationship comes with tears and hurt, but only the strongest ones survive. I love this man, and I'm ready to build with him.

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