Flames *Dan Howell*

A Trip to the Past

     The past was always something I hated remembering. It was so painful, thinking about all the things I have been through and just how much of it was actually my fault. Such as at age one, I remembering just figuring out about my powers, those forsaken and disgusting abilities. I was able to control the four elements: earth, air, water, and fire. My favorite was fire at that age, and it was a huge mistake. I remember the joy I had watching my finger become similar to a candle with a little flame sitting on my finger. I remember giggling and thinking it was so funny, watching the flame flicker. My overwhelming joy with the element caused a death in my life and the death of any happiness I would feel. 

     My parents were both very powerful, but neither of them controlled the elements. Actually, no one had ever had control of them, I was very rare and wanted around the world for good and evil purposes. My parents tried to keep my abilities concealed. My mother had the power to control time and my dad had the ability of telepathy, so giving birth to the "most powerful creature known to man" was a shock to them. As soon as they saw my messing around with water, bending it to my will, they knew they would have to protect me. It came natural to me to control these abilities. I don't remember a lot about my parents, other than their fearful faces as the burned to death. 

     See, the overwhelming joy I was talking about made the flame grow. Any laugh I gave, made the flame grow and grow, until it caught the chair on fire. My father, trying to save me from the destructive environment I had created, ran into the flames, catching on fire and screaming in agony. I realized then that my father was in pain, and I was scared. I started whaling, unsure of what else to do. I wanted my father, but the flames had gotten so out of control and I couldn't help him. Even if I could, I was too young to have the power to wield the flames away. The flames continued growing and I watched both my parents burning, screaming. Their skin became molted and rolling off their bones like wax, their bones became this powdery mess of ash. And I? I survived and the firefighter put out my mess, taking me to child services. And being so young, people thought I was clueless as to what happened, but really I understood so clearly. I understood I caused my parents death. 

     After that, I never used flames. I never made another candle flame, I concealed my emotions in fear I would cause an explosion. I didn't giggle, smile, cry, nothing. I became an emotionless child. 

     I was adopted a couple times, but none really stuck. Most were abusive and you'd think I would just defend myself with the last 3 of my abilities, but I felt this was my punishment for killing my parents. I deserved this. I deserved something worse than death. I wanted to kill myself when I first turned 13, but I didn't deserve the sweet release of death. I deserved the torture of living in this world of unhappiness and hurt. 

     When I turned 18, I was released to the streets of London, renting an apartment and getting a job at a book store. During these couple years, I had met 2 men who, despite my coldness and inability of showing emotion, befriended me. They lived across the hall from me and I have never been more thankful for Dan Howell and Phil Lester. 

     They are both Youtubers, with millions of fans. Dan is really awkward but sweet. He seem mysterious with his all black clothing and sly smirks, but he is actually an open book. I understand his emotions very easily and I don't know if that is because I don't have any or if I have become good at reading faces. Phil, on the other hand, is the opposite. He is full of bright colors and usually pretty happy. He is awkward but not near as much as Dan and as the ability to socialize. He is such a sweetheart and is quite soft spoken. 

     I became friends with them when I bumped into Phil while carrying my dinner up the stairs. I didn't become mad or upset or sad, I just apologized and threw my trash away. Phil, though, felt so bad he took me to his apartment for dinner with him and Dan. Though I am not the most interesting person to be around, I felt at ease listening to their conversations. And they seemed to enjoy me just hanging around, just being a calm silent presence around them. I was okay with that, too. 

     I never told Dan or Phil anything about my past other than that I have no family and I have a sad life. They didn't push the subject, they were happy just knowing what I did presently rather than my past. They also know nothing about my powers, and I am keeping it that way. I can't risk anyone else dying because of me. I feel guilty for lying but I know that if I told the truth, someone would get hurt. 

     At least, I thought I could keep my secret hidden, until I lost control of everything.