Babe, you look so cool | Junhwan

Chapter one:

Junhoe's POV:

He was perfectly short, with the most breathtaking looks ever and his small heart-shaped mole directly under his right eye. I had studied everything about him, all the small details that any other person would simply glance over. The petite boy's face was now familiar to me with my constant experience of daydreaming a relationship with the one that stood beside me.

We were walking down a wide road, that was oddly empty, towards a café. Besides the boy, Jinhwan, stood his boyfriend, the one I was in constant envy of. They had been dating for a year now, how could Jinhwan not like him? He was good looking and had a great body, Hanbin was his name. His arm was slung over Jinhwan's shoulder and I was used to feeling like the third wheel by now. Jinhwan glanced over at me and smiled, it was a smile I loved so deeply.
"You nervous?" He questioned with a smirk on his face.
"Hmm-" I wasn't paying attention, "oh, no no I'm not." I looked down at my feet, embarrassed.
"Yes you are." He nudged my arm with his elbow, "Look, Hanbin. Mr. Cool over here's nervous!" Hanbin looked over at me and they laughed together at my state.
"Hey, stop it! I'm not nervous. I don't get nervous." The laughter from the couple had died down.
"Yeah yeah, sure you don't." Jinhwan finished the conversation with his sarcastic comment and returned to the embrace of his boyfriend, with his arm snaked around his waist.

Over a year ago, before Jinhwan came out as gay, I was still in the closet, still swooning over the shorter male. I oppressed my feelings as best I could, however, the more I fell for the older, the more I became aware of my feelings and sexuality. When Jinhwan came out, I was so relieved and it drove me to come out, I thought that I had a chance with him. That was until I heard that he was going out with Hanbin, at that moment, my heart shattered into a million pieces. Yet, I'm still wrapped around his slender fingers.

I'd never kissed anyone or been on a date before (embarrassing at the age of 20, believe me, I know), so Jinhwan sought the help of Hanbin to find me 'the perfect man'. The boy was apparently Hanbin's classmate from university. Although I was madly in love with my friend of many years, I went along with this double/blind date with hopes that I would be able to get over the boy I liked to call Jay. Maybe I would fall in love with this mystery man, maybe I would move on from Jinhwan and maybe I would develop a healthier relationship than the one I'm in now.

After much walking, and third-wheeling, we had arrived to the café. It was a small place, family owned, with small succulents spread across areas that had no other use. We walked in and sat down at a table for four and waited.
"We'll order once Chan comes." I nodded, so that's his name. "He's really an amazing guy, I promise you will be head-over-heals in no time." I looked up at Hanbin and smiled.
"I hope so." Making one of my signature, cheeky remarks to sound comedically exhausted, I rolled my eyes for effect, causing the older two to laugh. A few moments later, the bell above the door rang through the café, bouncing of its walls to indicate someone's entrance. In unison, all three of us sat at the table looked over towards the door we came through. At the door stood a man who seemed slightly shorter than me, with darker skin and black hair that covered his eyebrows. He was dressed in a charcoal-grey, turtleneck jumper with a leather jacket and black jeans. From the corner of my eye I could see Jinhwan smiling at me. Chan walked over to the table and we all stood up to greet him.

First was Hanbin, who 'bro-hugged' him (I promise he's not secretly a straight boy).
"Long time no see, man, how's it been?"
"Not too bad, and you?" He questioned Hanbin.
"Yeah same here." He reverted his attention to Jinhwan, "This is my boyfriend, Jinhwan." Chan shook hands with him.
"Nice to meet you." He greeted and the other boy returned the words. The attention of the others was then reverted to me.
"This is my friend, Junhoe." The word 'friend' that left Jinhwan's lips stung my skin. I shook hands with the boy and we all sat down, Hanbin beside his boyfriend, who was opposite me.

We ordered coffees and teas while conversing for a short while.
"Oh, and by the way, I know I've been referring to him as Chan but his full name's Chanwoo." Hanbin had brought up between two sips of his black drink.
"Ahhh that makes sense now, I was wandering." I said as I glanced over at Chanwoo.
"Yeah, so how long have you know Jinhwan?" Questioned the black haired man while intensely staring at me.
"I've know him for like 5 years..." I looked over at him, "has it been five years?"
"More." He replied, "Boy we've known each other since the first day of secondary and now you're in uni." He lent over the table and hit my shoulder jokingly, I chuckled as my eyes wandered to my hands that cupped my coffee mug. "I think that's about 9 years now, seeing as you're in your second year (of uni) and I finished three years ago." Chanwoo nodded.
"Wow that's a long time, you guys must be close..." Jinhwan looked over at me and made weird hand gestures, as though he was encouraging conversation between me and the boy that sat beside me. I didn't know how to though.

Two hours and multiple awkward glimpses passed and Chanwoo had to get going so we decided to all leave. We were walking back home, Jinhwan was my roommate, it was the same formation as the one we had on the way to the café.
"Oh my Lord, Ju-ne," My heart fluttered at the nickname, "you were so awkward, you weren't like yourself at all."
"Ugh, Jay. Do you not think I already know that?" I looked over at the boy, slightly annoyed.
"Hey, it's alright. Jinhwan was just joking. First dates are always awkward and he probably understands that, I actually think he likes you." Hanbin cut into the conversation.
"Really?" I questioned.
"Yeah, and wasn't he amazing?" I nodded, he was great, but he wasn't Jinhwan and I hate myself for thinking like that. "I told you he was great."

We got to our apartment, but before we could go in Jinhwan spoke up.
"You not coming in?" The question was directed towards Hanbin, who lived alone.
"No, I actually have some stuff to do, I might pop in tomorrow though. "
"Alright, babe." Jinhwan replied with his hand on Hanbin's neck, pulling him into a kiss. I turned around to face the door before they did so I wouldn't feel the pain of having to watch.

We walked into the apartment and washed up. I was sat in the living room with a movie paused as i waited for Jinhwan. He walked into the room and sat beside me.
"Ready." He stated, I pressed the play button. He shifted closer to me every now and then, after a minute he threw his head on my lap and laid the rest of his body on the sofa. I hoped that he couldn't hear the sound of my heart beat growing more and more rapid.

I'm in some deep shit.