The Affection Test.

Chapter 16

Today was the day. I was going to activate the detective in me and snoop in Egon's office. I was getting the office ready with Janine and we basically made it look like an elf threw up all over the office. I pulled small gifts for everyone out of my bag and placed them under the tree. First I pulled out Winston's gift, a cute little stuffed beagle that looks just like the dog he used to have as a child. (Not canon, I needed a wholesome present for Winston) Next I pulled out Ray's gift, a Crochet blanket that would keep him bundled up all throughout the year. I pulled out Peter's gift, which was a nice Christmas tie that had Santa riding a surfboard in green swim trunks. Dana and Janine each got their favorite (expensive) bottle of wine. My present for Louis was a brand new suitcase, and inside was a "law for dummies" book as a joke.
Lastly I took out Egon's gift. A patent leather-bound book with drawings of us filling the book. Page after page was a pencil, painting, or just a picture of us. Doodles or actual events filled the book. And it took me months to finish. I slipped notes and charms and made it look sweet. I placed it under the tree next to Winston's gift and waited with Janine for everyone to show up and get ready.

*about two hours later*

The party began to reach it's climax and everyone was opening their gifts. So many hugs were shared and it finally got to the point where Egon and I exchanged gifts. I opened up the silver wrapping paper and inside was a black box. I opened it to find another charm for my bracelet. It was a brain. I giggled but Egon explained to me that it was supposed to represent him.
Egon opened his gift and thought it was just another book for his notes. He opened it and looked down and flipped through the pages. He closed the book and took his glasses off and began rubbing his eyes. He turned my way and squeezed the life out of me with a hug. I hugged back, but I couldn't help but think to myself:

This feeling is temporary. You still know what you have to do.

I let Egon go and he put his glasses back on. I gave him a kiss and told him I loved him but got up with the excuse to go to the bathroom.
I went to the coat rack and grabbed his keys. His office was upstairs and down the hall. I make it to the office door and slide the key into the lock and open up the door. It looked like a a tornado hit. Papers spilled out over the desk. The soft hum of his computer drew me inside. I turned it on and instantly it took me to a document. The header read:

The "Affection" Test.
By: Dr. Spengler and Dr. Stanz

I was confused so I scrolled down to the first paragraph.

This test was created by Dr. Spengler and carried out by him as well. This test originated from us performing similar tactics on mice, cats, and even monkeys. We got to a point where we needed to go one step further on a more complex species to get crystal clear results. The female human.

I scrolled and read and every sentence explained so much.

Procedure:
To conduct this experiment, we needed someone who we could keep an eye on for the continuing of the experiment, so we posted an ad for a job and selected only a few participants who would fit our criteria. We settled for a sweet young woman as our subject.

The first step was to promise affection and love and promise a positive environment. Then to examine different reactions, we had to give different personalities. Clingy, pushy, sexually advanced, and everything in between. We recorded the reactions and now we are here to give a fully formed hypothesis.

I kept scrolling. The pages went on. Even about our sex life. I felt my heart rip with every word, every calculation, tears streamed down my face as I clicked "print". I understood everything. I waited for all the papers to print. I went downstairs. I felt my heart race with anger and heartbreak. I took a deep breath and calmly walked up to the open doorway. Holding the papers at my side. Everyone turned their heads in my direction.

Everyone was silent.

"... so..."

I walked up and dropped the papers in a stack on the coffee table.
Egon and Ray looked at each other and then back at me.

"I'm just an experiment to you fuckers."

Nobody spoke.

"Charlotte, I-"

Ray walked up to me and put his hand on my shoulder attempting to console me. I turned in his direction and slapped him across the face. He went completely white and his eyes became larger than life.

"You knew. And don't even bother saying 'sorry'. If you were sorry, your name wouldn't be right next to his. Next to this- this... garbage! You ought to be ashamed. I considered you all my friends, my family! And you-!"

I pointed at Egon.

"I will never... ever forgive you. I put my life on hold for you. I got put in the hospital because of this experiment! Because of YOU! Because of YOU, I can't even leave this building without a risk of being possessed by an Egyptian demon who wants to take over the world! Fuck you and your fucking 4th grade report!"

I took Egon's glass of wine and poured it on the papers. I dropped the glass on the floor causing it to shatter all over. I turned to Janine-

"I'm resigning. See you around."

I grabbed my coat and walked out into the December snow- with no intention of returning. I don't think I will ever experience heartbreak like that again.