When Boxes Rattle

Chapter 5

It was hell, just like any other Advanced Accounting exam in any other school, in any other given time. Kevin often wondered about it: do teachers love it when they see their students suffer? Why do they have to discuss the easier parts and then test the harder ones?

"You'll understand when you take the review," Kalia had often answered.

Kevin walked with Terence until his ride's stop. They have decided to think about looking for the girl after the prelims.

"Finding her would prove to be close to impossible," Terence said when they were about to part. "But I know it's important to you that we do something about it. We'll think of something after Friday."

Kevin nodded. They still have three subjects left, all to be taken on Friday.

"I need to go," Terence turned as a jeepney slowed down.

As the jeepney drove on, Kevin felt an irritation on his throat. He inhaled deeply, a handkerchief covering his face, and then grunted.

He started coughing. It did not stop after a long while.

As the episode subsided, Kevin started thinking. It had been three years since when he first met her. Three years, and he was almost sure there was nothing about her that stuck on him. Nothing except the box.

He never noticed he had been waiting for her until yesterday.

"To hell with it," Kevin cursed as he rode a jeepney waiting in front of him.

He should be going home. Instead, he was going back to the mall.

The mall was neat and lonely when he arrived. It was only midday, and people only begin to flock at around dusk. Kevin re-imagined the scene three years ago, as he had been unconsciously imagining for years now.

That day, she had been wearing a dress made of white laces, intricately sewn and woven in webworks and snowflake patterns. Kevin could remember how her long hair had been carefully tucked behind her ears, a bohemian sack on her back, tribal bracelets on her arms, and the unfortunate Turk's held on her hands.

She had been wearing close to no makeup, skinny enough to not be inappropriate for her height. She was almost pale, except that her cheeks and neck were flushed with the hot wrap she was holding. One would expect her teeth to be brightly straight. But no--they were crooked, and yet they fit everything that was her perfectly.

How can a girl shining like that be left unnoticed? He could find her, Kevin resolved. He found her once when they bumped into each other. He found her again on one of the rare days he had left the box home. Kevin knew, if he wanted to, he could make it happen.

Such was the hope that heavy billiard balls provide. They would roll sideways and front and aback, and they would make sounds that belong to flat sides and angles. You're almost sure what they are just by the rattle--but they will always be inside their chamber and the chamber has walls and walls prevent certainty.

The entire afternoon was spent circling the mall, oftentimes visiting the places where they had been: the Booksale, Infinitea, the Westwing Exit. Kevin tried taking in as much as he could, rearranging theories and postulates, creating and recreating simulations.

"I have the box now," he said to no one in particular. "Shouldn't you be here?"

A girl went out from a girl's shop called Fetish, her back to him. She was wearing a yellow hoodie and skinny denim.

Kevin walked towards her. It was a random happenstance, an out of place moment. She had the same statistics judging from behind her, but so do half a hundred girls in the mall.

"Hey," Kevin spoke, his voice a notch lower than his normal volume.

The girl kept walking away, seemingly oblivious. They were only about five feet apart from each other.

"Miss. Hey!" He spoke louder now. Somewhat more than he intended to. People close by turned to look at him, potentially annoyed by his sudden stunt.

The girl ran.

Kevin followed suit.

She directed her steps to the escalator, then decided against it and went to the curve. They were on the second floor and there weren't many obstacles but for the pedestrians loitering. Kevin slid to a halt as he turned for the curve, then pushed himself harder forward against the girl.

Some people remained watching, some people laughed, some people grumbled, some took videos, some cheered. Kevin felt his lungs roar and his heart blaze. For three years he waited. Now, he chased.

The girl slowed in a shuffle step, then regained acceleration and ran straight still. She banked to the left and U-turned on the Southwing, again dragging straight.

Kevin persisted. He ran faster, pushing his soles to push his ankles to push his legs, finally to push himself forward. The girl was just right there, racing ahead, unwavering. Kevin smiled secretly. This was a chase he was sure he would daydream for hours everyday. This was a chase he would gladly pay for, a chase he would boast to the rest of the world.

And then he noticed he was following no one.

He stopped there at the center of the mall's four wings, panting and bewildered. He had been five feet away from her. She had ran. She had turned left and straight and she had dodged people and bags and trash cans.

Now, she's gone.

A guard strode towards him, clearly annoyed by the disturbance.

"Excuse me, sir, but you are not allowed to run inside the mall."

Still breathing heavily, Kevin shook his head. "I know, I know." He paused for air. "Where did she go?"

"Come again, sir?"

"The girl. Yellow hoodie." He could feel his lungs burning. "The one I was following--"

"The one you were what, sir?"

A ringing in his head began. "The one I was--"

Kevin collapsed with the guard looking at him quizzically.