"He's fierce in my dreams, seizing my guts
He floats me with dread
Soaked in soul
He swims in my eyes by the bed
Pour myself over him
Moon spilling in
And I wake up alone
If I was my heart
I'd rather be restless
The second I stop, the sleep catches up
And I'm breathless"
=======
I hear Lena's steps getting closer. I look over at her and see her cleaning the pieces of broken glass of the photo frame I threw an hour ago in my attempt to ease the anger against Shawn. She puts the broken glasses on the bedside table, then grabs the picture and looks at it a few seconds.
It's a picture of Shawn and me, I was sixteen and he was seventeen, he was carrying me on his shoulders while I was putting a star on the top of my Christmas tree. That's the first Christmas we spent together as a couple two years ago.
Tears start to run down my cheeks again when that memory comes back to my mind and I snuggle more in my bed. Where the hell didi it all go wrong?
"Diane, I don't really know what you're going through but I can imagine it hurts" Lena says as she sits next to me and caresses my arm "But you can't break down, I know it's difficult but you have two beautiful babies that need you but not like this. I am your best friend for something and I am going to help you with everything I can, I know I'm not their father or a boy, but I'll try to help. I'll move here permanently and go to college, I was gonna take a gap year anyways so I still can apply here so I can help you in the afternoons or something" she tells in the sweetest way possible. I sob.
"Lee, I can't ask you to do that"
"You're not asking me" she gives me a small reassuring smile.
"Thank you" it takes me a few seconds to find my voice and that's all I'm able to say.
I hear a baby crying which I recognised as Dylan. I stand up from the bed and walk to their room. I pick him up in my arms and start to sway him slowly, but he isn't calming down. Shawn, you idiot, how I need you to sing him something right now!
I go to the living room so Dylan doesn't wake up his sister and she starts crying as well and this becomes a mess. A worst mess than it already is.
I start to get frustrated after I try everything: he ate already, his nappy is clean, he doesn't want his teddy bear, what else can I try to make him get to sleep?
Dylan lets out a fart but keeps on crying. I roll my eyes.
"You are definitely Shawn's son" I say to him as I sway him to calm him down.
"You need any help?" Lena says funny and I give her a begging look.
"What do you think?" I answer.
"Give him to me" she extends her arms. She sways him but he keeps on crying and screaming. I bring a hand to my forehead in desperation. Doesn't he get tired of that? "I have an idea, but you're probably gonna hate me" Lena says randomly "Hand me my phone" I give her her phone that's on the couch and she starts to look for something. "Girl I love you and I'm sorry but I have to do this" I frown my brows not understanding what she means.
Suddenly the room is filled with Shawn's voice.
My heart squeezes. I need him so much right now. I didn't know how much I miss his voice until now that I hear him sing these beautiful melodies.
"And was it necessary to choose exactly that song?" I ask sarcastically when I recognise 'Don't Be A Fool'
"Sorry" she smiles like a five year old. I look down to her arms when I don't hear Dylan's screams anymore and he's now slowly falling asleep.
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EVERMORE ; SM
Fanfiction{currently editing} "But at the end, they end up together again because they were each other's first true love and they knew that they never stopped loving each other, not even the years could erase those feelings. It shows that if you're meant to b...
