~Everything~

~3~

                          • America •

As I was strumming random strings on my guitar I heard distant screaming and I casually ignored it. I was used to it. Afterall it had been that way since I was 6.

Before that my parents lived happily as a married couple and had 3 kids; my older sister, me and my younger brother. Then my Dad got fired. The reason was never said. From there on he couldn't keep a job. We flew from a state to another. No difference did it make. My parent's still argued. Dad still lost his jobs. Money still came. From where? Honestly I couldn't care less about it.

My fingers continued playing a wondrous melody. A smile appeared on my face. I was at peace.

Then a screech interrupted my thoughts. My mum called for dinner.  For the first time in forever she had cooked an actual meal. We had to pretend like we were a family over dinner.

Spoiler: All we do in this family is act. No one faces the truth.

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                       ♡ Europe ♡

"No one faces the truth these days. Everyone thinks how popular you were at school makes a difference out there. Only it doesnt."

"But..."

"No buts. You stay true to yourself no matter what sweetie. You'll  make us proud no matter what you do!"

"Even if I become an author?"

"Minor correction: We'll be proud no matter what you do; except if you turn out to be an author."

" But..."

"No buts; we've already been through this. There's so many things that can go wrong sweetie. You're going to medical school as we've planned."

They say this every morning at breakfast before I leave for school. It's like a plea sometimes. They might think it's an encouragement and to keep me going on. But when you've been having the same conversation every morning , at the same time everyday, it just gets boring.

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                          • America •

Dinner couldn't be any more fake. We all poke at our food, lie and compliment my mum on how good it was, talk about our day while I sit listening ;mostly hoping this ends,so I can go back to my guitar.

You might say I'm ungrateful but wait until you're in my shoes. Even a teddy bear would say no to my life.

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                       ♡ Europe ♡

They keep forcing me to be someone I'm not. I love writing that's all I'm cut out for. They might have planned my whole life for me but I have already done so. I love Biology and Chemistry; don't get me wrong ,yet writing is my passion. My parents know that. They just want their daughter to achieve everything they didn't.

That's just a glimpse of how forceful parents can be.

Anyhow rambling to you isn't going to make matters better. It's just another thing I have to live with. Along with the others.

After that mood booster ( *cough* sarcasm *cough*) I make my way to school. With my ear buds in blasting music which I never take notice to,as I say my affirmations and hope for a somewhat peaceful day.

In the end clutching my teddy bear when I get home always helps.