Panful Love

why him

I feel embarrassed what if he told people how i was acting there going to laugh I guarantee you they are, man why dose it have to be him why not no one elsa. I mean there other guys out there i bet he has a girlfriend but hadn't told no one what if he dose then im doomed wait who are those guys wait are they his friends oh no i ran to the bathroom. He has a lot of friends well he only has 3 but still that's more than i have man my heart is racing me why * toilet flush*  huh wait i screamed very loud and run out as fast as i can oh no that was the boys bathroom. That is so embarrassing what if that boy tells Jake he saw me in there im going to be doomed then i bumped into something or someone i look up then i see Jake i back up as fast as i can s s sorry i wasn't paying any attention to where I was going its ok her take my hand. Wait what then Jake looked the other way and said please don't make me say it again as if he was scared. o ok  i grabbed his hand it was so soft and smooth thanks smiling at him then he looks the other way and starts to itch his head no problem then i look at the floor and started to walk to my second period i feel bad for some reason i can't cry i have no reason to cry.
He probably was embarrassed because i have no friends and he hear people talk about me i i can't take    just when every one sat down i ran out the class room with tears in my eyes i ran home and into my room. My priest dad asked me if i was ok i said no because i like this boy and i don't think he likes me aw sweet i hate to see you like this your should get some rest so you can calm down dinner will be done by time you wake up, ok priest dad. I wake up and smell dinner i walk down stairs oh and did i mention having a big family i know right crazy but any way i love my family after you eat take a shower or bath ,ok i clean my dishes and takes a bath aw man i really want to meet my real dad i get out the bath and get dress then head to bed i know your thinking how can i go to sleep when i just when to sleep well first i just studie then when i get sleepy i go to sleep. So i studied now im heading to bed wake up or elsa your going to be late for school i don't want to go tho but ok i get ready for school and now im on my way. I really hope that Jake or no one talks to me i go in the classroom i heard that you vanish from your 3 period yesterday what's going on are you ok if not please let me know Ashley yes im ok truth. Ok then, then i see Jake walk in and his friends plus the guy with blond hair and blue eyes im so scared u should just sit down i feel like everyone is looking at me wait they. Are i can since it oh no what am i going to do my heart is racing me as if im having a heart attack am i going to pass out no i can not pass out not now Jake is looking at me i think im sweating i don't know because I have too much pressure on me i can't feel nothing but my heart beating i can't hear nothing please stop looking Ashley Ashley Ashley hu yes im alive then the class starts to laugh.