Only falling in love

Chapter 1

I'm young and dumb I don't know get a I'm doing with my life, no fucking clue at all and the worse part I'm ok with it I know I'm suppose to care but I don't not any more , don't get me wrong I use to care I really did I wanted to do things with my life but that didn't end up happening because I decided to do something and what's that , well ladies and gentlemen and non-binary pals I fell in love , correct I fucking fell in love I fell in love with an amazing boy a boy who could light up my world in seconds and boy who knows how to make me feel happy a boy who made me feel emotions I didn't even about he made me feel amazing but I guess I was not the girl for him he wanted something else something that will excite him and I wasn't it so he went out trying to find it without me knowing , yes he cheated on me and I felt foolish for falling in love with him I felt atupid for not listening to my friend as they told me that he was no good and that he will only use me but this is not one of those stories because he was good for me I knew that I had changed him and anybody could see that , I thought that we were meant to be but I was very wrong. I was in love , but I was also young many people would think that teens don't know what love is and that we should fall in love when were older but I disagree I think its nice to fall in love young , love is beautiful it truly is but its a pain in the fucking ads and I think that's a good way to learn heartbreak its a good way to know that not every thing in the world is amazing and sparkles and glitter and shit no its about feeling destroyed , broken , and alone it means that in a way we learn how to survive. I personally believe that the people who are deppresed are dangerous why? well its because they know how to survive this shotty world that we live in , I'm not gonna hold anything back right know I'm deppresed too have been for a while and its honestly Hell but since we are on the topic about me then let me introduce myself, Hello I'm Melody Johnson and I am 16 years old and in deppresed and have anxiety and I Fell in love with a boy with a beautiful name a name that I would never forget and that is Gabe Hale , Gabe Hale made my life amazing he made me feel special he made me feel loved he made me feel many emotions that I never knew fucking existed he made me feel happy he made me feel angry he made me feel brave he made me feel sad he made me feel like I meant something that I was someone to the world but not only that he made me feel like shit he made me feel like I was not worthy he mad me feel ugly he made mw feel guilty he drove me crazy absolutely insane but I could let stop him why? Because I was in love with him so in love that nothing in the world mattered but him but again I just wasn't the one for him I was not good enough and I remember the last time I saw the love of my life before I walked away from him , funny he told me that he didn't want me and next thing you know I'm all he fucking want he startes to beg for forgiveness and I almost took him back but that was my heart talking and I didn't want to listen to my heart this time so I listend to my mind and let him go even in if it hurt me

I remember like it was yesterday that I left him oh wait because it was oops lol

I went out for a midnight stroll letting my mind wander to where ever it wanted to go so that's why I didn't realize I was at the park that me and Gabe had are first date at "Brooke park" it was an old rusty park but I enjoyed the park it brought a cool vibe I don't know why I guess I like the fact that they are so many amazing memories at this park, I sighed and made my way towards the swing and stayed there for 5 minutes just swinging only then to realize someone else was with me it was a male from what I can tell by the way the stand they moved a little closer and I hoped out of the swing and made my towards the other side of the park where the houses were closer I looked at them for a five minutes and so did they well I didn't know since they were in a dark hoodie and they had there hoodie up so I was a little sketched out , out of the nowhere it started to rain and the stranger looked up and I saw those blue piercing eyes that fell in love with , it was Gabe .
"What are you doing out here?" I asked
"I could ask you the same thing" he said I nodded awkwardly not knowing whether to stay or leave
" I miss you you know I miss what we used to be I misses all the good times we use to have I miss what we used to be. Do you miss it ? He questioned
" of course I miss us what we had is unreplacble we had something amazing but you fucked everything up and now there is no more us, and maybe there will never be an us ever again , you know I thought you were supposed to be the one that I could tell our kids on how we fell in love but now your the boy that ill have to warn my kids about ill have to tell them that there are people like you who will pry there hearts open just so they can spill acid in it and watch you be in pain and and all they will do is say sorry and expect you to forgive them but ill teach them to be stronger than that and that they won't fall for easily like I did, I guess its time I let you go,and its gonna be hard because a part of me will always be in love with you but the things you make me fell are not good, so this is me cutting the cords. This is me doing something I should have done a long time ago; I'm saying goodbye" I said in a bleak way not noticing the tears that were falling down my face I wioed them away as quick as possible and looked at gabe his face showed pain and he was teary eyed I looked at his Ocean blue eyes and walked away not wanting to look back

Hey so its. Me Naomi and here is a novela for my book. Ocean blue eyes hopebyoy guys enjoyed it , this will basically be a book about little cute and heartbreaking things that will not add to the actual book these are just small scenarios that I came up with