Scott's Pill

Cigarettes & Mothers

He held me tight as I lied in his arms. A night to remember forever. A night to drag on into other. A pattern of despair and the hopelessness of the love I carried for him.
"Scott, you have any left?" I ask him with soft and subtle breath. He hands me a cigarette.
I walk out onto the porch into the night as he follows behind and kisses my neck when I light my cigarette. I lean on the railing. Scott hugs me from behind tightly.
"I love you," he whispers in my ear. I smirk a bit and take a puff.
We get back into bed and I kiss him softly. We hum the lyrics to our song as we fall asleep, slightly giggling and slowly passing out.
The next morning I got up to make coffee. I noticed Scott was gone. I waited for his appearance for about an hour.
"Babe, where were you?" I had asked.
"I was worried for an hour and, and, I..." He hushed me with a kiss and smirked. "I was just getting something, don't worry baby. It's for you though, you do remember that our anniversary is in a couple of weeks, right?"
I giggled and brushed my hair behind my ears, "Yea... I remember."
"Good," he says putting the bag of shaving cream, razors, and a bottle of shampoo on the table.
He goes into the kitchen to pour himself a cup of coffee. "Can you pass me the sugar?" I pass him the sugar.
I say, "I had a dream last night," I look down and bite my lip.
He looks at me with a bit of confusion. "Oh, really? What was it about?"
I laugh and get up. "It went like, you were there and it was just like meeting you again. It was wonderful! It was almost like our first date all over again. We went to a carnival and we were in the freezing cold cuddling on a Ferris wheel. Smiling. Laughing. It was great."
He stood there smiling as if he had the dream himself. His smile called me. It told me to come closer and hug him tightly. And I did.
We go outside in the after-storm. I light a couple of cigarettes and give one to him. He talks to me about going over to his parent's house. I agree. 'Why not' I think to myself. Though, they make me anxious, I'll go.
Scott never really had a good relationship with his parents. But I've tried to help with that. And lately, it's been working out.
Having one on one conversations with his mom is like talking to a wall, though let's say there's someone else talking to the wall with you. You can talk and talk and talk to it, maybe even scream and it never listens. And you're forced to talk to the other person screaming at the wall with you. I honestly wish I could explain it better. But to shorten the point up, she's difficult to reason with.