From The Moment You Flipped My Tray

Happy Valentines Day!

Hi
Read: 18/12/17

Sylvie stared down at the same text she'd been looking at for months. Well, more specifically 1 month, 3 weeks and 2 days.

It had also been 1 month, 3 weeks and 6 days since Nara had broken up with her.

2 months and 2 days since Nara last kissed her.

That was pathetic. Pathetic that she knew the dates. Pathetic that she was counting, as if Nara was ever going to come back to her. Pathetic that she was crying still, after so long. It had been so long.

—

Valentine's Day

God she didn't want to get up. She didn't want to move.

2 months exactly. On Valentine's Day.

As Sylvie forced herself to get up she concluded that god himself had it out for her.

She didn't bother dressing up or even wearing makeup. She didn't have anyone to impress anymore. Valentine's Day was just another day for her to be sad. But heightened sadness, because she knew that all she would see all day was couples. Kissing in the halls, holding hands. Gross.

Grabbing her bag, she stepped out the door to make her way to the bus stop.

—
The bus ride was too short for Sylvie's liking. She guessed it was worse with the crippling weight of how much she didn't want to be at school today. Thank god her and Nara didn't share any classes.

Stepping into the school, she was greeted with hearts covering other people's lockers, decorated by their lovers. Not to be repetitive, but: gross. There was a couple standing right in front of her locker, holding hands. How dare they be in love. She laughed at herself. She knew she was being stupid.

"Move," she nudged away the boys by her locker, opening it to get her books.

She slammed it shut and turned to walk towards math. Then she saw her. And him. What? Why was Nara holding hands with him. Oh god. This couldn't be happening. Sylvie felt sick to her stomach. She rushed across the hall to the bathroom. She slammed the stall door shut and felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She had a boyfriend. A whole new lover who wasn't her.

How could she replace her so easily. Tears were streaming from her eyes. She was not going to class. Not this period at least.

Nara had a whole new person to kiss. A new person to hug and love. Not her. Not anymore. She had been replaced. Nara got over her so easily. Was she that forgettable? That replaceable?

She held her head in her hands. Her mind ran rampant with thoughts, but she couldn't place what she was even thinking. The one word running through her mind continually, being screamed: pathetic.

Pathetic for being so broken up about this after so long. Pathetic for thinking she'd want her back. Pathetic for thinking she would never move on.

She felt utter numbness. She couldn't be here. Not today. She stood up, wiped her tears, grabbed her bag and left the bathroom. She walked straight out of the school and nobody noticed. Nobody cared. She wished she'd taken the time to put her books back in her locker. Her bag was heavy as she walked down the calm streets. She decided to walk as far away as she could to get some coffee. To the other side of town. Hopefully the cafe was empty. It should be quiet enough at 9 am on a Tuesday. Most people are at work or school by now.

She knows she should feel some semblance of guilt for skipping, but as she sat sipping her scorching hot black coffee she felt nothing. She loved the bitter taste. No sugar even. She loved the tingle as the heat of the coffee burnt her tongue. It hurt, but at least it made her feel something.

She stayed there for hours. She read. She ordered lunch eventually. She left at 1. She wandered again. Eventually finding a bus stop and riding it home.