I Can't Hide The Fire Within (Divergent Fanfiction)

Hello! This is my new fanfiction and I'm quite excited about it. I hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you think! :)

My name is Sophie Willis and I am amity. I say this phrase to myself every day hoping that one day I’ll actually believe it.

The test was wrong. This is where I belong. The test didn’t work on me.

I try to convince myself that I mean these words but each time I say them they just seem hollow and fake.

No one else seems to notice though. No one sees that I’m always acting, that I’m always lying. I’ve been lying my whole life, so why would they notice now? I’ve managed to convince everyone that this place is where I feel at home and where I want to be. They don’t see how my head snaps up every time I hear the trains whistling past. They don’t see how my eyes follow the dark clothed figures as they leap from the fast moving machines. They don’t see it because it’s not what they want to see.

I am the daughter of a very influential member of our faction, Frank Willis. Although it is common knowledge that amity has no one leader, just a representative to express our joint views, some voices in our discussions are more persuasive than others. Some people’s views still carry more weight and are more respected than others. There’s nothing that can be done to stop this, it’s just the way that life works and my father happens to be one of those people with an opinion that people respect.  

I was born into this life and amity was always expected of me. The possibility that I may have gotten something else on my test or that I wanted to go somewhere else never crossed anyone’s mind. In their eyes I was the perfect amity child. But it was all an act.

My parents believe that a lot of people misunderstand where amity came from. It is often assumed these days that our faction is about kindness. However, my parents disagree with this, they think that our faction was founded solely on a desire for peace. And as they always tell me, wanting peace is very different to kindness. My parents believe that peace comes from order and control. They believe in doing things for the greater good and they recognise that sacrifices might have to be made in order for peace to be achieved. My parents are not kind.

I love my parents, I really do, it’s just that sometimes I wonder if they love me. Nothing I ever do is good enough for them. They want me to be perfect and ordered and I try. I try my best to be organised and follow the rules. I try to always be on time, I’ve even taken to setting my watch five minutes fast in an attempt to stop myself being late, But somehow I always find a way to screw things up. I can never just be perfect. I can’t be what they want me to be. No matter how hard I try I mess things up for them. And that’s what they see me as, a mess in their ordered and peaceful lives.

I scurry along the pavement towards my house. I’m going to be late for dinner. I’m running eleven minutes behind the time that I should be. My parents are going to be angry.

Maybe if my father isn’t home from work yet I can convince my mother not to tell him. That would at least limit the damage. I glance at my watch again. No, that’s not going to work. My father will be getting home in seven minutes and I’m still fourteen minutes away from my house.

Crap!

My parents would scold me if they heard me cursing but I only do it in my head and not even they can control me there.

I hear the thunder of an engine approach and my feet freeze. Suddenly I forget that I’m already going to be late home and that my parents will not be happy with me. All I can focus on is the sound of the train as it gets closer. I watch, my mouth open in awe as I see the machine shoot past and young people dressed all in black hanging onto the train, sticking their heads out of the open doors. I can’t stop the smile from spreading across my face as I hear them cheer from the exhilaration. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to stick my head out of a speeding train’s door. But there’s a fluttering in my stomach that tells me that I really want to know.