[✅]Why You Left [Nam Joon x Reader]

Why You Left Part 003

You lay in his arms, wide awake, as you hear his breathing. Well, as his snores beside you. You snicker as that part of him hasn't changed. You stop almost immediately as what happened hits you.

This wasn't part of the plan. This wasn't part of any plan you made when you finally got your shit together after leaving him. He was never part of any of your plans in the very first place. Even back then. Life just sort of threw him into your mix and you went along with the current. You remember the happy times when you two first started as does with all relationships with its so called honeymoon period. That happy period was a bubble as you hid your relationship as much as possible from the public.

It only lasted four months when all hell broke loose. That was when things went downhill when he had to mend any damage and he worked until he was bone tired. He was never there anymore. The fans finally got to you and you never got any privacy.

That is also why you escaped to a place where no one knew who you were and you worked. You tried to make sense of the entire thing him, processing everything. You wrote. Bit and pieces of what the both you did together. The things you found funny about him. The sweet things he did for you. The things that you did that surprised him. Then the songs came. The music came first, during a thunderstorm when you couldn't sleep. Then the words. You wrote, you drew, you painted, you sang. Anything that could help to soothe the pain within.

And then one day, the pain was finally bearable. It dialled down to a bearable ache. You started to post some of the writings. You started to post the doodles you drew. You started to post the songs. That was how it got picked up. One thing led to another and now...

And now you wonder, what is going to happen now. Will it be like before? All that pain and frustration and insecurity... It was something that you never want to feel ever again. Despite the joy and elation the both of you felt in that little bubble, you can never feel the way you did just before you decided to leave him and that after effect of actually leaving him. You don't want to.

Worst of all, that was something you choose, you had a little bit of emotional preparation for what was to come. Joon didn't. You kept tabs on him from Kyung Hoon. The moment you walked away, you already had everything prepared to leave. And you did so, going onto the plane with tears in your eyes. He tried so hard to find out where you went to. He eventually accepted that you disappeared and the devastation Kyung Hoon described that he went through was nothing compared to what you heard in his music. You never want to put him through it again.

It starts to weigh you down and overwhelm you to the point you find it hard to breathe and all you can think about is leaving.

Glad that you're on the outer side of the daybed, you slowly scooch off the daybed and hastily grab your bag and clothes, leaving them by the door as you scan the place again. You hear the rustling of the blanket Joon pulled over the both of you last night and his low sleepy voice.

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"Go back to sleep Joon, I just need the washroom."

"Okay... don't take too long..."

You hear his deep breathing again, knowing that he has fallen back to deep sleep so you pick up your things immediately and left, risking leaving anything else behind. You gently close the door and as you turn around, you stifle a scream as you face another familiar face.

"Going somewhere?"

"Yoongi! You scared the crap out of me."

"So, it really was you last night. No wonder he disappeared without so much as any word. Not even text."