The Pain of Memories

Chapter 3.. Confusion

Makarov stood on the balcony above, watching his children with sad eyes. Not one person in the guild wasn't worried about Lucy. And they had every reason to be. From what Loke said, Lucy fell unconscious after looking into the eyes of Umidjon. Never in his years has he ever seen someone so affected by glancing at a magic from the eye in all of his years. His first action upon the arrival of Natsu and Lucy had been to confer with the Thunder God Tribe and ask if they knew anything of the similar eye magic, but they were unable to give any advice or guidance. Meanwhile, Lucy was fighting a war unknown to us within her unconscious mind.

"Attention, everyone!" Gramps called from the top floor. What little chatter there was ceased. "As you all know, Lucy is still asleep. We expect her to wake up soon, but we don't know what her mental state may be like. So I want all of you to be very careful around her, as we don't know what she could possibly be dreaming of. All we know is that Umidjon, the mage that cast this evil on her, invades the person's deepest memories and changes them, twisting the events to cause the person the most pain."

Everyone stared towards the infirmary door helplessly. Natsu could feel his heart throbbing at the pain Lucy must be suffering through right now.

"This is all my fault!" Mirajane cried. She covered her face with her hands and wept. "If I hadn't gotten Erza and Gray to stay behind, then they would have been there to help protect Lucy!"

"Wait, why did you make them stay?" Natsu asked confusedly.

"I was trying to let you and Lucy be alone. I hoped she would confess how she feels and you two would come back a couple!" She slapped her hands over her mouth. "And now I just gave away her secret to everyone! I'm a terrible person!" Elfman and Lisanna held their crying older sister.

"It's not your fault. If it's anyone's, it's mine. I should never have agreed to stay behind. I should have gone with you!" Erza yelled, slamming her fist onto the table. Bisca patted her back gently.

"I should have insisted on going," Gray yelled. Juvia hugged him, and for once, Gray didn't push her away.

"Trying to take the blame from others all day will bring nothing but sorrow," Makarov said. "Blame is the poison of what-if's. It was no one's fault, and nobody will take the blame for what was an attack. All we can do is help Lucy recover."

Natsu stood up suddenly, his chair clattering backwards on the floor loudly. He walked straight out of the guild, slamming the doors behind him.

He couldn't deal with any of this. They all complain so much. Lucy getting hurt was my fault. I should have protected her better. I promised I'd always protect her, damn it! I should have made her stay back at the hotel. She was already acting weird when we got there! Of course I didn't realize that man was her father until Erza told me that he lived in Acalypha. I am so stupid.

Why couldn't I protect her?

What Mira said still rang in his ears. 'I hoped she would confess how she feels and you two could come back a couple.' Does that mean Lucy feels the same way he does? For so long now, he's had a crush on her. That's why it hurt him even more that he's the reason she's suffering right now. I don't know when I realized that I liked her, just that I did. I promised I'd always protect her. He roared in pain and frustration. Why did any of this have to be happening??

"Natsu," someone said in front of him. Without his knowing, Natsu's feet had led him to Lucy's apartment. He looked up to see Gray standing with his arms crossed. His face was unreadable.