The Rat's Gift |Peter Pettigrew| (Completed) #harrypotterawards2019

7

James was still regarding Peter with a pitiful expression.

An expression Peter couldn't bear to look at. He felt bad miserable enough on his own but to have James sitting there, pitying him was too much. James Potter was supposed to be angry at him. He wasn't supposed to sit across him, make him a cup of tea and listen to his sorrows.

However, as soon as he thought that, James' gaze shift and he looked out of the window. Without warning, it suddenly darkened outside and the pearly white glow from the moon flooded the cabin through the window. Peter could observe that it was a full moon. He turned to James who was smiling.

"Brings back memories, doesn't it?" asked James.

Peter nodded. He was startled by the sudden change in surroundings. He remembered the days when they would be eagerly anticipating the full moon. The planning that went in to the adventures. The disasters that almost happened. How they initially fought with the centaurs which then eventually turned in to a kind of friendship with some of them. He remembered the times when James and Sirius would race those centaurs inside the Forest. How Sirius would stay back with them to learn more about the stars while James was left to tend with Remus. Those entire memories made Peter feel bitter-sweet.

It was suddenly starting to get extremely cold. The fire had disappeared with the arrival of the night and he could hardly decipher what was around him. The only thing completely visible was a sliver of James' face, illuminated by the moonlight.

"You wanted to know how I refused?" asked James in a soft voice.

Peter who had been distracted by the on goings in the background, suddenly gave James his full attention.

"It's very simple Pete. There's a huge difference between being dragged in to a battle and walking in to it with your head held high," said James.

"What's there to choose from? What difference does it make?"

Even though Peter could not see it, he realized that James was smiling.

"It makes all the difference in the world Pete. What was happening to us, to the people around us, it was bigger than one person, bigger than one family. I decided that I would die for what I believed in knowing that one day, we would prevail. I might not be there when it finally happens, but I would like to think that I played a small part in it."

At this point, Peter felt an odd sensation in his stomach. It was a familiar feeling but he couldn't place what it was.

'Come on Peter! It's just a damn broom! There's no way you will be unable to fly!'

'Pete! For fucks sake, if you don't transform in to an animagus, I swear we are not going to transform ever again. Moony can bite himself to death!'

'Look forward, Wormtail. There's no need to feel so miserable. You might not have got it today, but eventually you will. I have complete faith in you.'

'It's just OWLS Wormtail. If Snivellus can, then you can too!'

'I know it's difficult for you, Pete. You and your father were very close. But he's gone now and he wouldn't want his son to be moping around. We are here for you now. Whatever happens, I am here for you!'

'For Merlin's sake Wormtail! I thought this debate was over during the OWLS. It's just the NEWTS. You'll get by!'

'Peter. I have a favor to ask. Will you be our Secret Keeper?"

It was the feeling of pride of having James Potter as his friend.

All those thoughts flooded Peter's mind at once. Once again, the horror of what he had done filled him with agonizing regret. He felt ashamed to the very core of his being. He suddenly remembered how Harry had stopped Remus and Sirius from killing him. The boy, who was the very image of his father not only in appearance but in character too. It only increased his shame.

"Why are you doing this, James?" he asked.

"Doing what, Peter?" retorted James.

"Al l this. Sitting with me like everything's fine when we both know it's not."

James sighed. "Everyone blames you for what you did but I guess part of the blame rests with us too."

"What are you talking about?" asked Peter, bewildered.

"When Voldemort threatened you, you should have come to us but you didn't. I guess it was because we didn't make you feel as if you could rely on us," stated James.

Peter's shame started to flow out through the corner of his eyes as tears. He could not bear that James was taking the blame, however little, on himself for the sin Peter had committed.

"James, please stop!" croaked Peter.

"We should have treated you better. We should have paid more attention to you. Made you feel that you belong. We didn't and I guess we paid the price," continued James.

"James, STOP! Please, I c-can't bear this. You can't shoulder this- I am so sorry! I shouldn't have-It's my fault- mine alone! " Peter was sobbing heavily, the tears flowing profusely down his cheeks.

Suddenly the cabin disappeared and they seemed to be standing on a platform which Peter couldn't see. Everything around him was covered in white and the only person there besides him was James. However, it was a much younger James. A James who looked probably fifteen or sixteen. He was in his Hogwarts robes, staring at him with a cocky grin, his hair messed up as usual.

"You wanted to ask me something, Wormtail?"

Peter stood there, stunned and unable to speak. He couldn't understand what was going on. James' voice was much louder this time.

'YOU WANTED TO ASK ME SOMETHING, WORMTAIL?"

And suddenly, Peter realized what he was talking about. Ever since that day, the day that James Potter had died, Peter had wanted to ask him one thing.

"Will you- will you forgive me?" asked Peter in a quiet voice.

James gave him a wide smile. "But Pete! I already have!"

Before Peter could register James' words, everything went black and Peter felt the ground beneath him give away and he was falling.

Peter let out a humongous scream as he spiraled down in to the abyss.