Tale 1: War of the Protector

Chapter 20

I hated coffee. I didn’t understand how anyone could enjoy it. The smell, the taste, it was too strong for me and I hated it.

I cupped a mug of it in my hands, and just breathed it in. It was maybe the main thing keeping me sane.

May sat next to me and petted my hair. “I thought you hated coffee,” she said.

“I do.”

She probably thought I was insane. I probably was.

It was unnerving to have Cody gone from my side. My nerves were frayed, tracking every blurred movement of his aura as he trekked further and further from me.

I twitched and took another deep inhale of the disgusting coffee aroma. It was somewhat comforting.

The chain around my neck grew heavier with every minute that passed. It was a mental pain so physical that for a moment I considered taking it off. But I was filled with a shame so thorough at the thought that I knew I would never take it off.

They were Cody’s parents’ wedding rings. They were priceless in meaning. Heaven knew why Cody would ever give them to me. It was my full responsibility to take care of them.

At least until I get it back to him.

No. Cody’s gone. He’s dead to you. He decided this. Just respect his decision. He’s tired of dragging you around. You’re with your sister who you cherish and love and have been looking for forever. You’re happy that he left. You’re happy. You. Are. Happy.

I’m not happy.

At least you’re not upset.

I’m upset.

Well, at least you’re not going to miss him.

I miss him.

Those words rang in my mind with startling clarity, and echoed against the new shadows and empty spaces.

“You’re upset,” May said. More like stated.

I shrugged, too concentrated on figuring out how I felt to respond.

She sighed. “Hey,” she said gently, “don’t break my mug.”

I looked down to where my paper-white fingers gripped the coffee cup.

“Sorry,” I muttered. But I didn’t let go.

May sighed again and started pulling my fingers from the ceramic cup. I whimpered in protest and pulled away. Scalding coffee sloshed out of the mug and down my fingers but I hardly noticed because I had lost feeling in them a long time ago.

“Lily,” May said worriedly. “Look at me.”

I wouldn’t. I stared at the half-full coffee mug and pouted.

“Lillian,” she said more firmly. I pouted even more at the use of my full name.

“Come on Lillian,” she said with an irritated tone. She grabbed the mug and attempted to take it out of my hands.

My self-pity slowly started turning into anger. I yanked it back and more sloshed out. It started working through my head that May was still acting like a bossy older sister. She was the one who separated me and Cody last night. She was the one who made him leave. She was the one right now, trying to tell me that I couldn’t sit here and mope a bit. Telling me what I could and couldn’t do.

I glared at her and yanked the mug to myself, spilling a bit down my shirt.

“Lillian Ann Emerson.” She said it as if I had hit her.