" DOMINOS " + STENBROUGH

[17]

god, i wish he was gay, stan thinks, as he stares at the boy sprawled across his bed.

stan is sitting in the chair at his desk, mindlessly doing calculus homework, while bill denbrough lays back on his bed, staring at the ceiling and talking about whatever thoughts float into his mind. they've done this for years—stan sits and listens, and bill talks, and it really seems to help with bill's stutter, by letting him practice verbalization with someone he's comfortable with and doesn't stutter as much around.

the only problem is that stan is hopelessly in love with bill. with his terra-cotta brown hair, that falls loosely across his forehead, with the freckles that make constellations across the bridge of his nose, with his intense blue eyes, that shine when he talks about something he loves.

they shine now, bright as the sun. but bill is talking about beverly.

he's going on and on about her smile, and her laugh, and the softness of her hands. and stan wishes bill were gay, so maybe he'd have a shot. maybe stan's name would be rolling off of bill's tongue in a mix of appreciation and adoration that beverly's name does now.

stan's sigh stops bill, causing him to sit up and look at the boy.

"whuh-what's wrong?" bill asks, eyebrows drawn together, curious eyes exploring stan's face, searching for the answer.

"nothing," stan mumbles. his eyes turn to the calculus worksheet in front of him, which looks boring and tedious, but he begins to solve the first problem anyway. he glances at the silent boy on his bed. "you can continue, you know." the lie feels venom on stan's lips. he doesn't want bill is continue. if he's being honest, he wants bill to confess his undying love for stan, and kiss him, but he knows that will never happen, so he settles for this.

"oh-okay." but bill doesn't seem too convinced. he continues anyway, however, telling stan about something beverly did yesterday at the movies.

"she-she scrunched up h-her nose when she laughed, and it was fuh-fucking adorable," bill says, now laying on his stomach, ankles crossed over one another in the air, resting on his elbows to hold him up. "and, uh-another thing is, she has the whuh-whuh-whitest teeth. i mean–"

"jesus, bill, if you like her so much, marry her already," stan says. he's frustrated, and tired, and his heart is breaking with every word bill utters. not to mention, calculus is impossible, and his head is too all over the place to focus. bill's eyes widen at the edge in stan's tone.

"suh-suh-sorry," he mumbles, glancing down at stan's comforter. he's tracing over the navy stripes with his index finger. stan sighs.

"actually, bill, i-i have a lot of homework. i think you should maybe leave..." stan lets his sentence trail off. bill looks up at him with an unreadable expression. confusion and sadness swirl in the sea of his irises, and he frowns, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of stan's bed.

"i-i think that's a guh-good idea," he says quietly, hooking his backpack onto his shoulder and making his way towards the door of stan's bedroom. "see you tuh-tuh-tomorrow."

and with that, stan watches bill walk away.

——

hi sorry i've been MIA for a few days, i'm a little under the weather and i've been going to the gym a lot so i'm either never home or i'm asleep or doing homework or something, so sorry

this is SO short sorry it's also not edited rip

unrelated but add me on snapchat @ mollykanach and we can start a streak or something !!
- m