I lay in bed unable to sleep. I sat up and looked at the grandfather clock at the end of my room it was ten past the hour of one. I have not been able to sleep. I lit the candles in the room then I went to the window seat, Jacob had moved the young girls body to the barn and it was still heavily raining but I hate to say it my mind is not on the topic of the young girl. My door opened suddenly. It was Kia she looked as if she hadn’t slept either. “begging your pardon miss but I saw the light coming out from under the door miss Juliet”. I looked up and replied “it’s quite all right Kia. I couldn’t sleep. “I know what you mean miss Juliet. It’s a horrible business miss. Slave trading I mean.” She looked tired and her eyes looked puffy, like she’d been crying. “that it is Kia. Come sit” she looked at me startled “excuse me miss”. “yes” I said “sit, please Kia” she took a nerves step forward and sat down beside me. “I want to do something to help Kia, but I don’t know what I can do.” She looked at me without saying anything. “you’ve been crying Kia what’s wrong?”. She sighed “it pains me to see my people treated like animals. Branded like cattle. But not you miss Juliet, ever since you were a child you were kind to everyone. You held that poor girl in your arms as she took her last breath and now you want to hold a ceremony for her. It is good to know that there are people like you and Mr. Halford, in this world.” She finished and then went quiet. “would you like to come to the girls funeral tomorrow Kia?”. She looked up and smiled lightly “yes miss Juliet that would be nice” we were silent for a few moments then Kia smiled “I know it is not my place miss but Mr. Gabriel looked quite happy to hold your hand.” At this I giggled wildly along with Kia then I sighed “you would think so wouldn’t you?”. “don’t give up on him miss” I smiled at her then yawned uncontrollably. “oh pardon me” I said blushing. “it’s quite alright miss, shall I put more coal on the fire?”. I got up and back into bed. “no it’s alright Kia, you should get some sleep to” she smiled, blew out the candles and bid me a good night.
My dreams were quiet dreams that didn’t wake me at all. However there was one thing in my dreams which could not go unnoticed. Gabriel was there in almost every dream. I woke up quite early the sun had not yet risen. I slipped in behind the curtains to my window seat. I sat there for what felt like hours. But it was one or two. I watched the sun come up it was beautiful. The grass glistened with dew like tiny diamonds. I heard the door to my bedroom open and someone walk in. the curtains were pulled open and Antoinette squealed in surprise “ Manquer vous quels sont faisant sur si tôt. vous m'avez donné une peur.” (miss what are you doing up so early. You gave me a fright.) I smiled at her “Je suis antoinette désolé que je n'ai pas signifié vous effrayer. je n'étais pas capable de dormir si je me suis levé environ il y a une heure.” (I’m sorry Antoinette I didn’t mean to frighten you. I wasn’t able to sleep so I got up about a hour ago). Then I got dressed in my Sunday outfit, Antoinette brushed through my hair and let it hang down with various pins. Then I walked to breakfast. My grand mama gave a large unladylike gasp. “what happened to your forehead child?”. I had almost forgotten about my injured head and then thought about what people would think at church. My papa saw my distress “there was something involving a runaway slave being shot and when Juliet went to help her she injured her head. I sat down at the table and laid a napkin across my lap. I picked up a piece of toast. And began buttering. “and what of the slave?” my grand mama asked only vaguely interested “dead” my father replied even less interested. After breakfast we walked to church, and as I expected people gasped as they saw me. With my bruised eye and the great big scar across my forehead. As always the grownups went to talk to each other then we children and young adults were left to have conversations. The people who never paid any attention to me came to talk to me. One girl who had once been my friend but not anymore, came right up to me “what happened to you Juliet? You look absolutely terrible”. Then Gabriel stepped forward “come on step back she’s already been through enough without everyone asking her what happened to her”. Jonathan the second most stuck up boy in the town laughed “maybe Gabriel beat her and he doesn’t want everyone to find out” then surprisingly Michael stepped forward “quiet Jonathan. There was a runaway slave girl shot last night and Juliet tried to help her but hit her head doing so.”. Then another girl spoke up “that’s very well, but that does not explain her bruised eye”. Michael stepped back “I don’t know the answer of that question” then he looked at me “there was a suitor at my house and he had a temper. So he hit me across the cheek.”. “well” said a girl smiling at me smugly “what is it with you and getting injured or beaten”. Before I could say anything back the reverend stepped out of the church to let people in. I never understood church. It was just something that we were told to believe in.
I just never understood what it really was to be Christian. I’ve always just said what the reverend and the bible says. But even as I’m thinking this I’m repeating bible verses. Then we stood up to take communion. I chewed the communion bread and drank the wine. Then when the ceremony was over, I walked outside with Gabriel. “are you ready?” he asked me. “yes” I replied quietly. “But we have to wait for Kia. She wants to come to the ceremony” he nodded. Kia came along a few minutes later. “thank you miss Juliet, for letting me accompany you” “it’s very kind of you”. We walked out to the woods, once we had found Jacob. Once he had dug the grave. He went to get the girl. We stood there solemnly. Jacob came back, and quietly laid her down in the ground, then he stepped back quietly and looked at us on the side of the grave. “me being a grounds keeper I’ve buried lots of things in my time. But never anything so sad. Such a shame.” I looked at him. He was no older than twenty. “I know, it’s such a sad thing, and only we four people seem to care.” Gabriel stepped forward “should one of us say a prayer?”. “I will” said Jacob then I closed my eyes. “ it is today on February 5th that we lay to rest this young girl and we ask that the lord will except her into heaven. We do not know her name, but we do know that she was taken from us before her time. We ask that she find peace in heaven with the lord and in the kingdom of god. We pray that she will forever be at rest, in her home in the ground. But her spirit will be free of this earth…” . I hear Kia sniffling. I open my eyes and she has tears rolling down her cheeks. I put my arm around her. I’m fighting back the tears myself and fail. Jacob is still talking, I feel so sad. Gabriel takes my hand to comfort me. I bury my face in his shoulder, tears spilling down my cheeks. “amen” Jacob finished and looked up “is there anything else to say?”. “I don’t see anything else that needs saying” said Kia wiping a tear from her face. She knelt down and started picking up flowers and fashioning them into a bunch. Then she bent down into the grave and placed the flowers in the girls hands and stood up. And Jacob started burying her when he was finished he walked away shaking his head slowly. We started gathering stones and placing them on the grave. When we were finished Kia walked away and I sat down on a nearby rock and breathed out slowly. Gabriel just stared “this should not be like this” I whispered then sighed and got up and started walking towards the house.
