Lone and loved

November 17th 2017 {Friday}

Just like any other day it's school. A day where you don't learn a thing, cause I'm looking at her. She with those lovely amber eyes, beautiful silver hair till her shoulders and that her hair divide right under the right eye. It's that cute wavy hair. Perfect. And she is so tall, taller then most the boys in the class. I adore that.
And then there is me, just a little girl, always gloomy or unsure. With two friends. I am never with at school. Only when I'm home on the internet, and the times we talk is less then a fresh sketch book. I sometimes talk to people in class mostly her. I often eat my lunch and then just go to the toilet and sit there. Like that's important to say.

Oh by the way my name is Skylare. And
this is my life diary

*put a cool anime opening here*

Hi there again. I am writing this in the class room. It's a few minutes before the bell rings.
She is like three desk ahead. I never said her name did I. It is Emely. I think it is pretty strange written but that's it.

Even tho she is really cute, she isn't really one of the popular ones. Many guys likes her, but not her. She hangs with the geeks. She is one too tho. I like th......

Sorry for just cutting it out there. The teacher shouted at me for like 10 seconds till he slammed his fist onto my desk. All the other pupils laughed. Of course. But not her, she almost help me by scaring the other pupils and smiled back at me. I sit all the way back so I saw it all happened. The class went pretty normal after that. People shouting random things that is never necessary, acting stupid on purpose and showing that they think they are the main point of class. After class she came over to me and asked if I was okay. I had a little voice-crack, and said yes. She came back with "U sure" I just nodded like a idiot, well more like really slow. She just smiled and walked away.

My first thought was as the stupid ass person I'm "What if she likes me?" And two second later I was like. Never. She was just trying to be nice. I think. Not many do that to me lately. In our little brake, two theachers came up to me since I was alone. I don't get why they even try. I'm in middle school, so 8th grade ro 10th grade, half way throu 8th grade and i don't feel like I have any friends in school. The class is just loud jerks. So no to them. I wish I had the guts to talk talk with Emely and her friends. In class when we can just talk when the theacher is out for a while. I always hear what they are talking about. They just have to say things like. "Captain cold was so brave" or something like that, but I can't move at all it's like my intire body is begin torn apart if i stand up. So I just continue drawing to get the pain away.

Anyway. The bell rang. I was at the back of the school. There is a small little forest. Well not so small. It isn't like ten meter wide or something, but it's just a place for me to relax. And escape to my mind palace. It's cozy. When I came in to the school many was doing what they were supposed to do.

It was the class of the week where we could do allmost whatever. I often just grab my earplugs and write or draw some things. Today was finally diffrent.

I came in the room with my phone and plugs in one hand and my head down. I hear a familier walking pattern. There she is. Emely. Right in front of me

Is she gonna talk.

She came here.

Please!

Talk!

TALK!

My head was like for half a second, but what felt like days. It stoped the moment she spoke.

"Do you wanna sit whit us?"

I felt a warmt in my body like never before. Like I had been weeks in the Autarctica, and I finally found a house with a lit up oven. Filling the entire room. Also that I may finally belong someplace. I nodded a couple of times before I said "Yes". Emely smiled, never seen such a great smile before. She turned her back to me like she was marching in the military or something. Turned her head to me and said "Come here".

Such cutenees and exstra. Love it so much" was my only thoughts when I walked to their desk

"So this is the boys. It's Mack, Jax and Dylan. And me, Emely. You probably  know our names, but I guess since it's our first tine really meeting" she said it so calm and comforting.
Wow.
"Hi" said Mack, kind of shy. With his black hair and almost fine green eyes. Also the lowest of them all. "Hello" said Jax with lack of energy to say it right. He had also black hair but you can see it's dyed by the blonde roots, that make it some how cooler. With his dark brown eyes anyone could stare into for hours. Dylan just waved really extra with a big smile. Recently he dyed his hair pastel pink but before it was brown. The pink hair goes really well with his fantastic blue I always noticed. I also noticed how him and Mack sit really close, kind of couple close.

The four of them sat at a desk of two. Mack and Dylan on one long side, and Emely and Jax on the other. But when I came to the desk Emely stared at Jax like "Move!". And took another chair really annoyed but when he turned around to us looking at Emely almost proud. It all happened so fast. Me having people talk to me. Like really talk to me. Not just a "hi" or "crap". I felt my eyes tearing up but I didn't want them to see me this way.
Vulnerable.
Like I'm not used to this. Yeah, I totally talk to every human begin I see. Anyway

We didn't really talk that much they just wanted to look in my sketch book and I said "Sure". Like I don't care what they do. Ass long they don't leave me.

That class was our last of the day and the week so we just went all home. Even tho I looked that Mack was going home with Dylan. I kind of know where most people walk or take the bus home. And that bus wasn't Mack's. Nothing really happened to me on the bus station. Just walked on my bus, a quarter had pasted and I'm off. Where my bus stop is quite the place. We have the store right there, some houses and just nature. Well I can't really enjoy it when there are many people going off there. So most of the time my head goes
"The back or front"
" They all go to the back I should too"
"Just let me pass".
And other stuff I don't want to say.

Right now ass I'm writhing this in my room. The clock is almost midnight. Been saying a lot, writhing for half an hour. This is all I have to say about today.

Bye xo