Roomate

Blame it on the alcohol

"Honey I'm home" I joking yelled out once entering his dorm room, after finishing his classes for the day. The room was empty and all signs that there were two boys running wild getting dressed was gone. Throughout the school day I kept thinking back to the fact that I took a shower with Tao this morning. Not that I felt I was now gay or something, it's just that I honestly didn't mean to offend him or anything. Growing up playing football I spent a good amount of time showering completely naked with a bunch of guys. I hope I didn't freak the poor sap out too much. I was changing out of the clothes I wore at school and started to change into something a little more deserving of possibly getting dirt; couldn't have my good clothes being ruined. Half way through my change there was a knock at the door, I quickly put on my pants and answered the door. It was Blondie and she had that look in her eyes.

"Oooh no shirt? Someone is half ready for me, lets just get that other half ready" she grabbed at my pants desperately trying to pull them apart.

"I'm gonna need you to put some heat between your legs. I'm heading off campus for a couple hours to get some booze, so either you're in or you're off to go play house with someone else"

She decided to go play house with another kris, it was okay I didn't mind . On my way out to the car I met a new friend of mine, Tao and it didn't take long before I convinced him to ride along for some "party favors" for tonight. I finished parking the car in the parking lot of the liquor store I turned toward Tao.

"Alright spill it, what's wrong? You look like you left your cellphone unlocked at your girlfriend house" he gave me a weird look. "What? It wasn't funny? Or am I the only person that fears that?"

"How are you gonna get liquor? We are only 18!!"

"So?"

"IT'S ILLEGAL!!!, like jail time ILLEGAL!!"

"Look Tao just shut up and act natural"

We casually entered the liquor store and by we I mean I did. Tao had the most suspicious wide-eyed look on his face and he shivered constantly. I quickly grabbed a bottle if tequila and a bottle of vodka. I turned to to motion Tao over only to find him jetting out of the door, I continued to the cash register.

"So what's up with your buddy there"

"Uhh diarrhea"

"Oh yeah, can you show me your ID sir?"

"No"

"What?? Why not then?"

"Because I left it at your moms house that why"

The register guy gave out a loud chuckle "I'm just playing with you kris, that'll be 30.25" I gave him the money before heading to the door; Rick, the cash register guy called out to me.

"What's up?"

"Hey Kris how about leaving the dead weight next time? If I wasn't here you'd be on your way to county man. "

I smiled "most definitely"

I entered the car only to find It empty, Tao walked out from around the corner and got in.

"Really?"

"If we both get arrested who's drive the car back before it gets towed" I shook my eyes and started to head back to school. On the way back we decided it would be nice to stop by the theatre and watch a movie. We decided on watching X-Men and after a couple of hours we were on our way back to our dorm room. I learned alot about Tao from our little trip. He is Chinese just like me, he love Starbucks, knows martial arts, Gucci and working out; his favorite color is blue. We made it back to the dorm room around 7 pm, the sun was starting to go down.

"Alright lets get this started now before you punk out. What do you want vodka or tequila"

"Eenie, meenie.."

"TAO!"

"Alright alright I'll take the vodka because it looks like sprite and I like sprite"

I grabbed a red plastic cup for me and a shot glass for Tao. We spent this time joking about our past experiences in life and also at the train wrecks we witnessed at school. Like the girl who dresses like a stripper because she thinks its empowering or the guy who sits on his car all day with a toothpick in his mouth trying to pick up chicks. After about an hour and a half I finally was able to get Tao to down four shots of vodka. I was on my third cup of my vodka/tequila mixture. Tao wanted to try but I advised him not to since he's not a pro like I am.

"Listen man" I slurred my words out "I'm seriously sorry for leaving you in here. Put yourself in my shoes, my friends don't understand and they don't listen to explanations. I guess you can say I punked out on you bro"

"I'm over it it's al.."

"And I'm sorry for being naked with you in the shower"

"Really kris it's.."

"I can only imagine how scared you were all alone and deserted with only air and my amazing Rudolph's between us"

"Rudolph? Who's ru.."

"My lifestyle can be ALOT I understand. There's blondie man she's so fucking hot."

"Kris"

"but I swear I wanna screw her black friend though. One day she fell and her skirt slipped up and my life had never been the same."

"Kris!"

"Or maybe I should I screw her best friends sisters cousin, Victoria since Shea Chinese like me"

"KRIS!!!!"

"I was a little scared you might try something"

"Wait what?" Tao grabbed the cup in my hand and placed it to the side

"I mean I just always thought you were gay, no offense"

"What about me seems gay?"

"I mean you carry a purse and put on eyeliner"

"THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME GAY THAT JUST MEANS I HAVE A SENSE OF STYLE!!MANY STRAIGHT MEAN DO THIS"

I grabbed my cup and downed the rest of my drink. That makes four cups.

"And plus what makes you think if I was gay that I would want you"

"No one is this galaxy can resist me, not guys, not girls, teachers, my great aunts tabby cat"

"Tabby cat?"

"Tao come here" he leaned into me probably expecting me to whisper something but instead I grabbed his shirt pulling him closer until our lips met and I pressed mines into his. He jerked back wiping his lips viciously, I ran and tackled him wrestling him until he couldn't move under my weight and gave him another kiss. Everything went black after that. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the toilet with tissue pressed to my nose.

"Whadd happun?" I slurred groggily

"You tried to lip rape me so I kicked you in the nuts and kicked you in her face. You passed out"

"Aw man I'm sorry I must be wasted please don't tell anyone"

"I won't I don't time for anyone else to question my sexuality. Plus it's my word against the schools womanizer" Tao left after that and I spent the next ten minutes cleaning up the blood from my face and stopping the flow beating myself up the entire time. I entered the candle lit room expecting to find tao sleep but instead he was laying on my bed in nothing but my boxers, hands behind his head.

"What can I saw I'm tipsy and you were right"