wolf song

chapter 5

I am just not who I think I am any more what am I and what can I do I think over and over but that last part what can I do and what if i lose control again and…..and  kill once again I fall back on the bed only to be attacked with small paws and lots of kisses i laughed …..as crimson and azera both went in for the kill the fox eyes no don't you dare I said in a playful way but they did there big green and blue eyes glossed  over and and the light hits just the right and makes them shine nooooo you win I said  as crimson came and sat on my chest and azera cane and sat next to me on the bed he was so much bigger than when i first found him then again we have been gone for three weeks I pick him up and snuggly him to my chest you're so soft I fill a small head on my side yes i reach over and pet her soft head I start to drift off into a world full of dreams but was waken up when the door opened and slammed shut
I sit up and I rubbed my eyes you didn't have to wake me you know what's going on I said as I made my way across the room nothing i just he takes a deep breath and let it out I want to leave this place I don't want to stay any longer …..there was a silent mood in the room i know that you don't like staying in one place for to long but what if he comes back and I  am not here and what are the chances  that he will he yelled not likely that for sure you don't know that for sure and you can't prove that. I don't want to leave yet, not when there is still a chances I can fill myself breaking on the inside I quickly move to the door but i was not fast enough he blocked it please just let me by ...we have spent too much time here we need to leave I know that you don't want to but we have to peploe are starting to talk and it's not good they want you to leave because you are making them really uncomfortable and besides if we stay here we may never find him he is not going to come back just because you need him to we need to leave …..she backed away from me I get it we need to leave but that does not make it any less harder for me to let this go  she looked at me and throws once strong eyes were now wet with tears I just can't let this go but you're right we need to leave as much as I don't want to we need to we will leave……. tomorrow she said I want to leave then that way we can have a early   start ok I want to have one last look around to make it easier to leave she walked away from me and grabbed her bow and walked over to the window she took one look over her shoulder and jumped i wanted to yell but I knew she needed time to cool off she will be back in a hour or so but I was definitely to hard on her

I fall to the ground and take off the fall was nothing I jumped from tree to tree once before and i am used to it I run to the outer edge of the forest where I slung my bow off my shoulder and shoot at a tree I move around and shot again over and over until I could not anymore I fall to my knees and let out a skerm ….it felt so good to let it all out I sit down on the ground and take it all in this is so how it feels to give up on something when you feel it so close I get up and move to the trees and remove my arrows from them no matter how many times I shot them they don't seem to want to break I examine the arrows nothing they look as they did the first day I got it …..I move to the next tree and remove the last one and make my way back to the inn a uneasiness falls over me I pull my clocks hud over my head to console myself I need to get out of here and fast I turn and run I start to feel better when I get further into town but I still don't feel right I walk around to try and shake this unsettling feeling but it's still there I don't like this I walk back to the inn with this feeling hanging over my head I go out to the balcony and sit azera came out and sat with me until I could not stand the cold I looked out over the busy town one last time and take in all of the beauty it has to offer tomorrow we start off to a new town ….I walk in and close the door I start to pull my think together so that I will have more time to look the town over I pull everything out but I stop when I find the blanket that had once been big enough to fit around to very small foxes but now it may only fit around one of them I set it aside and put what belongings I had back into the bag I take off my knifes and put them in the bag I move to the bathroom and chang I crawled into bed I held on to that blanket  I felt a small paw find its ways  under that very blanket and second later there were two little heads sticking out from under that now very small blanket but it felt good to have to have something to remember my home and what had all happened that very fateful night