MEMEKOOK: A SAGA

the beginning

loud music? check. way too many people to count? check. alcohol flowing? double check.

lit party, right? jimin really came through on this one, taehyung thought.

"yo, when's kook gonna be here?" hoseok sounded a little tipsy already, and this would only worsen as the night went on.

"he said, like, whenever he arrives, which is real useful." namjoon, yet to touch the alcohol, already sounded done with the younger.

"hyung, he'll be fashionably late, you know what he's like." yugyeom chimed in - how did he get here? - and yoongi nodded in agreement.

"'gyeom's on it with his Superior Understanding™ of the young mind, as usual."

"yoongles, you're drunk as shit, since when is he 'gyeom to you? right, never, because that's my thing." a voice rang out behind yoongi, unmistakeable in its tone.

"jungkook!"

"...that is me, congratulations, grandpa. the alcohol hasn't clouded your old-man mind too much, then? sure we'll see you banging out the dance to my i before the night's out, hyung."

yoongi rolled his eyes, a faint red tint appearing on his cheeks (he'd blame the alcohol, but he'd also blame jungkook) as he struggled to respond.

"am i allowed to say 'fuck you' to your face, or are you still too young?"

jungkook pointedly ignored him, shooting a line straight for the beer, regardless of whether he was old enough to actually consume it. with the beer, coincidentally, came yugyeom, stood by the alcohol with a dazed grin.

"dance with me, hyung?"
jungkook blinked.

"i forget you're younger than me. lemme drink, bro, i'll be right with you. anything from here on is no homo, right?"

yugyeom fist-bumped him with a laugh.
"right, no homo. see you out there, dude."

•

"can't believe you're just like, rubbing your dick right up against me, that's super homo-"
yugyeom raised a finger to shh his now-drunk companion.
"like hoseok's not right in front of you? hyung, that's worse, cmon."

jungkook raised a finger to his top lip, attempting to bullshit a response before things got super awkward. he grinned, gesturing wildly and nearly hitting hoseok in the head.
"doesn't count if it's your band mate, 'gyeom." he countered, with a dab that was very close to taking a passing mingyu's eye out. (sure, yugyeom thought, lemme just go grind on jackson real quick, no homo tho, he's just a band mate)

"kook, watch your arms, you absolute disaster."

"no hyung?" jungkook almost sounded disappointed.

yugyeom snorted. he wasn't drunk enough for this.

"fine, hyung, let's get you outta here before you kill someone. god, imagine that, death by kook-dab..."

jungkook giggled at the sound of that.

"that's the best death, yugyeom, you gotta admit." he dabbed again, flinging his arms out just to be extra, and yugyeom had to struggle to keep moving the kid.

"jeon jungkook, however much you try, you cannot add 'tasteful dabs' to this song."

jungkook merely dabbed rather aggressively at yugyeom, shouting 'the ting goes skkkkkra!' and adding various 'brrr' sounds that made yugyeom want to die.

"d'you wanna shut up before i gag you?"
"that's kinky, 'gyeom," jungkook replied, dazed. "looking for an excuse to fuck me?"
"...kook, you're drunk, but i may as well admit it, since you won't remember this in the slightest."
"knew it. i'm amazing." another dab, this one coming dangerously close to yugyeom's nose.