Mystery of Love (boyxboy)

Problems

Joshua's POV 

I walk down the hall ways, panicking as I start running and I see them in arms and I can't take it anymore. I like him and all he gives me back is ........nothing. Ugh I sound like a sadist I never sound like a sadist he is making me feel and think stuff that I never do!! I walk towards them and wave, I receive a wave back from Bethany but not from him . But I have done such a hurtful thing to him I  guess i did deserve that, I still cant get his crying face out of my head and it's driving me crazy .

My eyes become blurry why are they blurry i don't even realize I am crying until i feel tears sliding down my face . OMFG i am crazy i am mad . I haven't cried since that day ........ugh i need to go but i can't without him . I walk towards him crying like a little kid and grab his hand and run towards the parking lot and get in my car opening the passenger seat for him . He looks at me confused and annoyed but he gets in . I start the engine and start driving . "what the hell Joshua we are not skipping school okay you are going to get us both into detention so just stop right now!!" he shouts but who cares I just want this feeling to be gone . Who does he think he is that he can make me cry ......I am so angry at him and mad at myself i dont even know what i am doing . We arrive at the park............yeah the park . The sad feeling creeps into me and i just cry and cry until i cant see anything and I am there alone in the darkness looking at his eyes and my mum...................

Alex's POV:

I feel like I am a monster . To watch him cry like that it was devastating the feeling is just unexplainable i know that he is hurt........but he hurt me too but I don't know the reason why . But i know that if a person cries like that they are hurt , hurt so much that they let their tears flow without bothering who is watching and just letting the sadness flow out through the tears. How I know all this ? Well I have been through many things I have cried for months and I still feel sad when i think about him...........my dad. When my dad  died i couldn't do anything it was as if i was not myself without him ..........I had to go to many therapy sessions so many that going to the doctors each and every day was like a normal routine to me . When I tried to make friends I used the cheery smile and naughty behaviour and after becoming friends i used to keep on the act but I had to go away to the doctors again . The hospital and the clinic was like a wall to my reality and fakenss. Its ironic though I went through so much pain that year now when i think about dad its just a faint memory of being hurt . I look down ........and there he is sleeping so peacefully even though he was crying earlier .........he is just beautiful ..........

OMFG i just thought a guy is beautiful..........lord i don't know whats going on with me . But if it wasn't for my dad Joshua and I would have been best-friends I mean we have many tings in common and specially our childhood. But then I would have been like him or maybe not . He losed his mother too a year later my dad's death so i was pretty over with it but I don't know how he could do that . I mean open up to everyone and receive sympathy whereas me I hid away from everyone .

To see tears  in those eyes was the last thing i wanted. Those piercing eyes looking at me full of hatred and sadness and I couldn't even say a word instead i shouted at him.......... I am just horrible. All these years I have never seen Joshua cry , he is the kind of person who is cheerful and would do anything to help others and he is reserved that's what people like about him. And i suddenly make him feel hurt...I am the worst. Involuntarily i stroke his hair , it feels so soft i could just stroke it forever but I don't even deserve being friends with him....."I am sorry" i mumble and take my hand off his hair. I missed the touch already but I shouldn't because this morning he was the person who I was annoyed at and now I have done such a bad thing....how can he possibly forgive me . I can feel the agony crawl through my veins making me shudder with disgust.....I am just horrible .... Suddenly the silence is broken by a soft whisper "mum" he calls out....I cant fight back my tears back anymore to see him in such a vulnerable state and the fact that I just hurt him ...I cant take it anymore. I undo my seat belt and get out the car slowly trying not to wake him up as i put his head down slowly on the seat. I shut the door and start running......running away from the sadness,fear and agony.