Is This What You Would Call Paradise?

chapter 3

on the third ring i heard his angelic voice sing, "hello?" he sounded irritated.

"c-cooper?" i sniffled and took in a breath. wouldn't it be better to tell him in person?

"Aarika? what do you want?" he sounded like he didn't even care anymore.

i closed my eyes and felt the tears burn my cheeks. i softly whimpered, " I want to talk to you about last night," i finally said.

after a moments pause," Aarika, don't you remember, you broke it off with me? its ok, i know you were already with a guy last night. why don't you prance off to him and leave me ALONE?!" he was being so mean. he doesn't even sound like my cooper anymore. my cooper. do i even have the right to call him mine anymore?

" cooper, i know that i made a mistake! i do! i really honestly do! i need you, i need you so much right now, you don't even know. i need you warmth, your bright heart lifting smile, and reassuring words. i need to tell you what happened last night at the party, too." i took a shaky breath and added, " I love you." i whispered.

silence.

"C-cooper? baby, you there?" i questioned.

silence. i looked at the screen, still on the call.

"Coo," i began.

"im here..." he sounded unsure.

"can you come over?" i said. "please?" i added.

"yeah gimme 10 minutes," then he hung up.

Damn! i haven't even brushed my teeth! i began getting my self to a presentable state to see cooper. forgetting about make-up, knowing it would all run off after i told him.

**

when i saw his old ford pull up in the drive way i was getting dressed. as i pulled on my black-lace cami. i stopped right before ,y stomach. if i am pregnant, what would i do? tell every one that  i was raped? no, that would be to embarrassing! abortion? no, i cant kill an unborn child!

a knock at my door crashed me out of my thoughts. does he still have that house key i gave him?

"Aarika? you there?" his voice sounded so nonchalant.

i pulled down my shirt and waved him in.

he sat on my bean bag chair and i say on my bed. how can i start this? this is harder said than done! oh god! what if he rejects me!?

"hello?" he interrupted my thoughts.

"ummmm, okay. don't say anything until im done, okay?" i looked him in the eyes, his eyes were hypnotizing. he was wearing his shirt that he wore on our first date 2 years back in the 8th grade. it was black and had gray thorny vines all over it. it was fitting showing his muscled form. he also wore a cross necklace i got him for when his dad and aunt died. along with some old ripped jeans and a leather belt and some old black converses.

he nodded to show he agreed.

" at the party when you left i was drugged," i looked for a reaction. none. "and well this guy, he... he, um.... he took me away to a room. and i couldnt do anything. i was helpless. i was so scared and all i could think of was how you would react. i was scared i would loose you and every one around me, because i was being a slut and nobody knew the real reason, and they never will. i cant tell anyone about this. it would ruin everything i did to get to where i am. i have awesome grades, scouts are already looking at me for my basketball skills, and i have... had an awesome boyfriend, great friends with potential, and a loving family. i need you again Cooper!" i was crying horribly now. snot works and everything. " im so sorry, i probably don't even deserve you anymore. i should probably just go die in a hole now. " i took a breath. "i just," i began.

he wrapped his arms around me and i heard him sniffling. ive never seen him cry, only at the funeral. he pulled away and i saw a fesh tear run down his chin.

" i love you to, baby," he said. " im so sorry i said all that stuff to you when you called. im so lucky to have you Aarika," i dug my face into his chest finding comfort in his words.

i knew there was something special about him. he understands me.