Shy||l.t. a.u.

day nine

I know I should probably stop loving you.

I should probably start losing my feelings to not be a wreckless, lonely man when I'm out of my university years, but I'm in too deep with my feelings for you.

Everyday, the first thing that's on my mind, is you.

Everynight, before I fall asleep what's on my mind, is you.

I'm just immune to it. You being in my thoughts endelssly, and I'm pretty sure it's going to stay that way until I die.

We're in the audutorium again and I watch you text on your phone, your thumbs tapping the screen that illuminates the darker room. I wonder who your texting, and wishing it wasn't another guy.

However, I just can't help but think that. You smile, and I see your tongue push onto the back of your white teeth adorabally as your narrowed eyes scan the text message.

If only, if only I could be charasmatic and make you laugh, but I can't because I'm too shy.

Love,

     Louisx

"Hello senior students." the principle's voice echos through the large room loudly from the microphone, making the young boy's eyes snap from Holland's side profile to the man that stands smiling on the stage before him. "I brought you all here today so we could recognize the valedictorian of the class of two thousand thirteen and two thousand fourteen school year." Louis sighs shakily as he rests his chin on his fist that rests on top of his theigh, not really caring about this event. "So, the valedictorian for this school year is," the man pauses as someone whispers in his ear the lucky and intelligent student. Louis knows he won't get this because this wouldn't happen to a person like him, he's not really lucky like that. The boy glances at Holland again, seeing her still texting on the phone, and he can't keep his blue eyes off her. He's glad he could see her face in the dim room as the phone lights it up like a star. His heart flutters when her small hand runs through the loose, wavy curls before going back to the phone screen. "Louis Tomlinson!" a voice exclaims. Before he could comprhend what happened, the blonde's brown eyes snap to his and his dry lips part before he looks away at the front of the stage. No cheering or congratulations are heard, only silence. The boy gets up slowly, his limbs trembling. He makes his way down the long isle, since he was sitting so close to the back, and up the steps up of the stage before shaking the man's hand and being given a white folder. "Why don't we give Louis some applause?" he asks into the microphone. Finally, the students begin clapping for him, the audutorium erupting in applause. He walks back to his seat, seeing his classmates quietly laughing as they look at him or glaring as he walks past.

He feels his stomach twist and turn and he just wants to disappear at this moment to never be seen again. He thought being valedictorian is a good thing, but he's being laughed, mocked, taunted. If he was someone else he would probably be a little more respected, but he's just an outcast. He looks at his love that sat only three seats away from him, and sees the pity that swirls in her brown irises, making his heart feel as if it has dropped to the pit of his stomach,before her gaze to him flickers away and she looks at her phone again.