Ink || h.s [sequel to grapite]

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"Talk to him, for god's sake Sadie." Cara groaned in frustration, tucking her legs underneath her and trying to make herself comfortable in the white fabrics of my duvet. She squirmed about until she found a more-than-satisfactory position. Her long legs were outstretched and her back was resting against the footboard of the bed. 

I couldn't talk to him. I didn't know what to say, where to start, how to end. I didn't even know where we were. I'd been treating him like nothing, with no regard for his feelings. He probably hated me. He had every right to. 

"It's not as simple as that, Cara, and you know it." I replied, rubbing my palm against my forehead. The skin creased beneath my hand but relaxed again upon parting. I looked up to Cara, who was giving me a solemn look.

"I know," She responded quietly, "but you're going to have to try."

"I can't. I've screwed everything up. Everything's ten times worse now, and it's all down to me." I shook my head to demonstrate my refusal. Her solemn gaze turned into a stern one, and I knew I would be offered an ultimatum.

"The way I see it, you have two options. You can either grow a pair and talk to him or you can ignore him forever and hurt him even more. If you go with the first option, things might work out. Sure, things that happened in the past will be rehashed but it will probably be a lot less painful than seeing him in the streets and branding him as somebody that you used to know." Her legs folded and she sat up straight, craning her neck slightly to meet my gaze. 

"If I could, I-"

"No. No excuses Sadie. This isn't something you can just run away from. Think about the way the two of you were together. Is it really worth throwing all that away for bitter silences? Don't cut off your nose to spite your face, you're smarter than that," She interrupted. Looking into her eyes, I could tell that she was trying to be as impartial as she could. Candor was something that you could always rely on with Cara. There was nothing hidden or unjust. The blunt truth was all you needed to expect from her.

It had been the basis of our friendship. I was honest with her, and she was just as honest with me. The guidance of each other had helped us through situations that would have been unpalatable by ourselves. 

"I'll try. I'm not, by any means, promising anything though." I finally said. Her face lit up with earnest, and I gave her a gracious smile.

"That's all I ask." She laughed gently, her whole body shaking lightly with each humoured giggle she gave.

"Just one thing though," I pressed my lips together and exhaled anxiously.

"What?" 

"What if he never forgives me?" 

That was the outcome I dreaded the most. I wouldn't be able to live with the guilt that I had driven him so far away from me. It was guilt that had torn us apart in the first place. All my guilt meant that I'd kept secrets from him, left him in the dark. Then I'd treated him malevolently for it. None of this had been him - I'd been the one responsible for everything.

"Sadie, you're forgetting that he loved you. He probably still does. It would take everything in him not to forgive you." Cara shuffled up the bed, so that she was sat beside me. I leant my head on her shoulder, letting out a sigh.

"I hope so."

"He will," She affirmed, nodding enthusiastically, "you two drew each other for months without realising. You must have thought about each other a lot, I doubt it's any different now."

I felt my cheeks burn crimson at the thought of the endless times I had spent in art class letting my imagination out onto the paper. It seemed, though, that my imagination went no further than Harry. We'd never spoken, we didn't know each other but yet we understood each other. 

"You two can make it through anything."