Fall For Me | Namjoon [√]

15: smitten by her

KIM NAMJOON'S POV

Was this a dream?

I rubbed my sleepy eyes and peeled them open again, and Soomi was still standing in front of me, wearing that ever grimacing look on her face.

"Morning," she said, her voice flat. "Can I come inside and talk to you?" 

"Why are you here?" I asked meekly but stepped aside anyway. She barged inside like a storm. I followed her quick footsteps to the living room, only to find her plopping down on the mattress and taking out a few books from her bag, then placing them side by side on the table.

This was definitely a hallucination. Happens when your brain can't get enough oxygen so the hypothalamus starts showing things that actually isn't happening.

"I, ah, I'm going to go and wash my face," I muttered to myself and bolted inside. She was definitely here in person.

I had stayed up till late again, working on the idea of my thesis, and future plans away from the country. This entire week I had only slept for five hours tops every night, which was resulting my brain to go haywire.

After I was done splashing a good amount of water on my face, and cleansing my eyes a several times, I went back to the living room again.

"You took enough time." She was sitting there with her back straight, arms crossed over her chest. "I came here because I'm done going through all the materials you gave me last time. I need new books now."

I exhaled, taking a seat in front of her. I wasn’t even expecting to get the books back from her as surely it would've taken her more than three weeks to go through them all, or so I'd thought. "How did you finish reading them all in such a short period of time?"

"If you don't believe me, then take a quiz. Ask me something I wouldn't know." She said, staring into my eyes. "I even grew pimples for studying too much!"

She looked infuriated and I wondered why.

"Okay, I believe you. If you want to read more I think you can find books on your own. Just visit that library and—" I trailed off, taking a notebook and a pen that were lying on the table. "I'll write you the names, but this is the last time."

"Why last time?" She counterattacked, as I was writing down on the paper. I looked up to see her face.

She looked angrier but still, sad? Somehow.

"You said you would help me, so why are you pushing me away now?"

I couldn't speak for a second there. My mind trying to search for the words I hadn't prepared for those questions.

"We've talked about this Soomi," I finally said. "And you're good to go now. You don't need my help."

"What about my sexuality?" She puffed up her cheeks, furrowing her eyebrows more making a weird face. "Only you know. You said you'd help me!"

In lose of words again, I tightly closed my eyes for a second, then opened them. "Oh yeah. Right. I have this counselor friend I've told you about before—"

"But I need you."

She shut me off. My breath almost hitching at that point, and it felt like the world had stopped spinning. Did I hear her right?

"I need your advise before I need some counselor's. Yes, you're my teacher, and you were really friendly and I liked that about you. But now you're acting so strange, Namjoon!" She said it all in one breath. "I don't get you!"

I bit my lower lip hard, looking away from her face. How could I tell her that me getting involved more with her wasn’t doing anything good. That every time I looked at her face, I remembered my first love, all thanks to Yoongi messing up with my already chaotic brain.