If I had a dream... (young Leonardo DiCaprio) [complete]

day 5: knowing the truth

It was almost night when I came back. I could see the moon. Usually I can see the moon when it's 10 pm. So that means that I'm too late. I looked at the time in my phone. It was 11:23 pm. Mum will kill me. Shit. I was sleeping for so long...

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-Janet! Where have you been? Why didn't you tell me that you're going to hang out with your friends or...
-I didn't hang out with my friends.
-So what did you do then?
-I just... had a rest at my tree house.
-But you could tell me that you're going there!

and at that moment, when the rays of the chandelier on the wall lit her in the face, I saw dried tears. she cried. because of me.

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I went upstairs to my room, hoping to remember my next dream, but all my intentions disappeared when I saw my father sitting in the office and apparently waiting for me.

at that moment it suddenly seemed to me that he looked like Leonardo DiCaprio. he had the same blue and kind eyes and when he smiled, I immediately became calm at heart. so he smiled so often when I needed help.

it was so strange ... to see my idol in my father. of course, parents have always been and are my idols, but to see in my father the world-famous actor, and exactly at the moment when it seemed to me, I'm going crazy, it was strange.
it was especially strange that I never noticed it.

My father is a famous psychologist so when he was going to talk to me seriously, that meant that I can't lie to him. He could always understand and help me when I asked him to. But I think after this, he will think I'm a psycho and will take me to a psychiatric hospital. But I couldn't lie to him because he would understand it.

-Janet? Can I talk to you?
-umm... actually.... I had some homework... - and that was true.
-it will take 10 minutes. I promise. -I knew that it won't take 10 minutes but I had to sit next to him and talk to him.
-how do you feel?
-I'm okay. - I lied. he understood it. but he just knocked his head and looked at my eyes.
-I know something is happening with you. And I know what is happening with you.
-you don't. No one doesn't. And it makes me feel like I'm s psychopath.
-okay, I won't talk to you as a psychologist and a patient. But I'll talk to you as a father with his daughter. As a loving father,- I knew all of his psychologist's tricks. He just added a new sentence with the adjective like "beautiful" or "loving" or "lovely". He told me about this trick. It makes your interlocutor trust you.
-so what do you think? You don't even know what's happening with me! I didn't te-
-I had it when I was 23. It was 1997.
-I don't understand you...
-I had dreams. Like yours. I had a dream about my idol. It was Steven Spielberg. I really loved his movies and he inspired me to be an...
-what?
-I'll tell you later. But now, I just want you to trust me. I won't take you to the hospital because I had the same and it's alright if you have such dreams.

I definitely didn't understand him. I was so scared and I actually didn't trust anyone. That night I couldn't sleep. I mean... I tried not to sleep. I tried not to see that awful dreams but I couldn't. Even if I didn't sleep, my dreams pursued me.