Is This Worth The Risk?

Happy Independence Day, Kim

Kim I can't do this anymore. I'm really sorry.
-Sophie

It seemed like my world had stopped for a couple of minutes. I got a text from Sophie. The girl I thought was the one. Well ummm that's an exaggeration. We've only been talking for almost three weeks and dated for like 3 days? Or maybe a week? Prolly 2? Shit I totally forgot.

What? Why? I'm so lost rn

I texted her back while lurking at the gc. I was kinda nervous though so I was playing around at the gc to shake off the stress.

I looked at her name on my screen.

Sophie is still typing...

Damn! Damn you Sophie!

After 4 minutes....

Sophie is still typing...

"Damn what is she writing? A fucking essay? A short story? A novel?"
I murmured while impatiently waiting on her respond. I was still laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling, hoping she was just joking around or something. I mean I wasn't  that crazy abt her, it was just that I wanna know her more.

I can't do this. I love you but we live from different continents. This is so difficult. The time difference, the communication, me getting jealous and crazy because you're not here with me. I couldn't even cuddle with you, kiss you, hold your hand. We clearly have no physical contact, like sex.
-Sophie

Hey, whattttt?! I wanna make this a shot. Cmon. It's only been like 3 days?

I haven't known you that long but I am now soooo crazy abt you. We need to stop this. I'm sorry. Please block me as I'd block you too. Bye Kim❤
-Sophie

I threw my phone on the other side of my bed. I didn't bother to respond. For what? I never liked the idea of fighting for someone who already had given up. People come and people go. People come again, and again and again, and then just leave. Stupid cycle. I stared at my clock on my side table. 6:45AM. Dang! I immediately got up and headed to the shower. I wouldn't let Sophie ruined my day and I shouldn't be late for school. I have scheduled exams today that I needed to....hopefully.....pass.

xxxx

As I entered the campus, I could hear the different noises coming from school bell, students laughing, talking out loud, creepy footsteps, the sound of books being flipped, etc. I headed to the elevator and pressed 10. After a few dings, I finally arrived at 10th floor for my first period, which is Psychology. Before I could enter into the class, my friends grabbed me from behind.

"WHAT THE FFFF...."
I turned around and definitely shouted but Claire covered my mouth with her hanky.

"Did we scare the shit out of you Kim?" Shane asked while laughing.

I rolled my eyes playfully while trying to put my backpack's strap on my shoulders who were now sliding off.

"How's you and your Brit?" Claire asked teasingly while punching my arms playfully.

"When are you moving to England?" Shane asked with a silly chuckle.

"Wow, just wow." I replied with a very low tone, so low that they could hardly hear.

"Then explain biatch! I think we did psych out our Psych prof. He might've cancel today's exam." Claire squealed, still didn't realize on her bad pun.

"I got a text from her today saying we needed to stop this crap obviously because we live from different continents." I replied while putting an emphasis on 'we live from different continents' using both of my hands, gesturing an imaginary quotation marks.

"Oh damn. Sorry Kim, we're really sorry." Shane murmured in a silly manner, pretending she's sad.

"Condolence my friend. I hope you can move on in this very difficult situation. We are always here for you. She was such a gorgeous young lady. I am sorry. We are both sorry. " Claire added, playfully wiping her eyes with her hanky, as if she was crying.

Both of them wiped their eyes using their hanky while fake sobbing, hugging each other. Students were starting to look at out direction, either confused, being nosy, or just didn't care at all.

"Come here Kim. Sophie's gone. You need us in this situation." Both of them grabbed both of my hands, then gave me a very huge hug. I couldn't breathe properly. I was starting to think we were like three completely idiots getting weird in front of our classroom. They were my only super closed friends and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

xxxx

I was sitting in my car while I heard my phone vibrating. I got a message from my online friend, Laura. I met her when I was wandering around, finding an active LGBT gc to be friends with. I was seeking confidantes online because I was growing up in a very conservative family, and country as well.

I am the only child and the idea of coming out to my parents was already killing me. I was raised in a very conservative way. I even went to a private Catholic School which was so hard on my part. I was living in my shell. I remember bringing very thick Bible at my Christian Living subject. Pretending or playing that I was straight was so hard considering the fact that I had no choice as acting against the Catholic practices would be considered "immoral". 4 years in this school had been so hard for me. I had no one to talk to about my sexuality, not even to my circle of friends. I had to be in discreet. Same as with my family.

I opened her message while finishing up my cheese burger that I bought at Jollibee. I swiped down my screen to see the other notifications. I got 28 new messages coming from different people online, and the rest were from the gc. I've always liked the idea of talking about my feelings with other people online, especially to someone who's been going through the same hell as me. It felt like I was accepted in some ways.

Psssstt
-Laura

Yesss?
I replied to Laura. I put my cellphone on my car seat while getting hand sanitizer and pressed its button. I rubbed both of my hands, removing the odor of the food that I've finished eating. I heard my cellphone's vibration.

How's you and your bae?😁
-Laura

Well you're kinda late Lola. I'm single 😂 Ready to jingle 😉

Gc Kim, gc😄 Happy Independence Day to you!!!!!
-Laura

Kk 😂 lemme drive home safely first

I turned on my car engine and slowly drive away from the mall's full packed parking lot. I looked both ways and noticed how light the traffic was.

"I can get home earlier than expected today." I murmured happily to myself while turning my car's sterio. I was blasting songs from different genres, from country music, to pop, to classic, then to rock. After 30mins of driving, I arrived home with me and my car in one piece.

xxxx

Hello everyone and thank you so much for reading my work (if someone's reading this?😂). Anyways, this is my first story that I have ever written so please do bear with my flaws. And of course some parts are based on my personal experience. Uhmm yes I'm in a long distance relationship for almost 3 months now yayyy (we're trying to surpass the loneliness😂😂). And also feel free to message me if you wanna talk or something like if you need my inexperienced advice. English isn't my first language so you know what that means 😂😂 Much love xx