Please Don't Forget Me ~Gaara~

Chapter 14

Chinsei... If I had had any idea... maybe things could have been different... maybe I wouldn't have done what I did... But it's something we have to live with... Something that I have to live with

(Opening theme: Fake or Fate)

My head was rested in my hands as I sat atop the roof and listened to Chinsei's broken and despret cries. Temari was trying so hard to sooth her. But I know from experiance that the only one who can sooth her right now is me... And I'm the one who put her in that despret state. But it's not real... And I hardly believe that she would do this to me. What's more increadible is that I can't believe he was right!

At first I thought he was just trying to get under my skin... But I know the truth. Chinsei is using the one thing that I have wanted and yernned for all my life as a way to better herself. And that's something that I just can not handle. She of all people should know just what it means to me to hear those words. I've wanted love for so long... Wanted to know what it was like to have something like that. And she has to go and twist a knife in my heart like that!

I slammed my fist against the roof top, breaking several shingles. "But why did I have to break the damn bottle...?" The space where the familier little glass ornament used to sit felt cold and empty. Five years of wearing it... Why did she have to do it?! It's not bad enough knowing what I am and knowing that someone like me will never know truely what love is. I thought I could feel it though... From Chinsei... I wanted so baddly to keep her safe... keep her mine.

But she was never mine to begin with. All she ever wanted was to play with my fragile heart. Well, I won't allow it anymore. As far as I'm concerned, Chinsei is dead to me... But why does that make my chest hurt so baddly? My hand went up and held my head in pain as the demon stirred. He never did like it when Chinsei was hurt or upset. Damn that girls charm!

I thought back to when he warned me about Chinsei's true nature. I had gone after him for scaring her like he had...

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Knowing that Chinsei was safe and sound with Temari and Kankuro, I stormed out of the room and down the hall where I knew that dead prick was. My sand was ready and I mentally prepared myself for Chinsei's lecture on why I shouldn't kill people again. There he stood, a cocky bastard just in apperance. His black raven's hair, spiked up, his eyes so black they're almost unreal. He looked over at me like he could care less.

"Don't even start. I don't feel like listening to you rant about how upset she is and how you're going to kill me if I get anywhere near her, blah. Because I'm going to tell yousomething that's going to make you look at that 'innocent little girl' in a whole new perspective." he kicked off from his place leaned against the wall and strode toward me with his hands in his pockets. "She's lying to you." He said just as he was passing.

I never turnned. "Why should I believe you?" I asked.

"Why? Becasue I know girls like that. She likes the fact that you're different, and see's how stronge you are. She's pretending to be your best friend only so that she will have someone to protect her. Esendo is doing nothing more than telling you what you want to hear to get her way." His smirk grew."I bet she would even pretend to be in love with you." I turnned and sent a line of sand his way, hitting the wall beside his head instead.

"Mochiko is nothing like you're petty fangirls."

But Sasuke mearly chuckled and walked away. "Believe what you want. But I know what I'm talking about." When he was no longer in veiw I walked back to the room where a now calm Chinsei rushed to me, throwing her arms around me. She was so soft, and very happy to see me.

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The truth is, I love Chinsei. And I knew from the begining it was hoping for a miracle for her to truely love me in return. So I sat there and listened to her cry and scream, miserably saying my name over and over again. It was so hard to keep it together and stay up there. But I just watched the moon and thought about my up coming fight in the finals. I don't have time to worry about her.

But yet no matter how hard I tried... I couldn't keep my mind on the fight. It always drifted to Chinsei! Why can't I get her out of my mind?! Slowly her cries died down as she fell into a sleep I knew she needed. Sleep was rare between the two of us... always had been... Even though I could no longer hear her, I couldn't stop thinking about her.

She was so beautiful. Short black hair and pale skin. Not to mention those captivating ice blue eyes... Pull it together damn it! You will not let her weaken you! She's just another person... Chinsei is just as disposable as those other people....

The air was warm, even though the sun had gone down hour ago. I missed the fridgid night air of the desert, the smell of the sand. I missed listening to Chinsei sing in the late hours... Damn it, I did it again! Stop thinking about her!

"Couldn't save you from the start, love you so, it hurts my soul. Can you forgive me for trying again. Your silence makes me hold my breath, Oh time has passed you by." I heard the soft high sound of her voice and closed my eyes in bliss as the melodious tune floated around me. At the edge of the roof, I could see down to Chinsei's window open window where she stood with her hands folded and tears streaming down her face. "Oooh for so long I've tried to shield you from the world, oooh you couldn't face the freedom on your own, here I am, left in the silence. You gave up the fight, you left me behind. All thats done's forgivin. You'll always be mine, I know deep inside. All that's done's forgivin."

I couldn't listen anymore... So with my chest hurting, more than it ever has before, I stood and turnned, walking away from her, walking away from everything we ever had. This was it. ANd no matter how hard I tried to make myself think that was okay... I knew it wasn't. Because Chinsei had been everything to me for five years. Walking away from her was like walking away from my very soul.

It was hard, heartrenching. I wondered often times in the days that followed if I was dying because of how much it hurt. I wanted you. I loved you.

(Ending theme: My true self)