CAN'T REMEMBER TO FORGET YOU // REDDIE

f o u r

Please Eddie. Let me talk to you. Meet me behind school after dismissal.

-Richie

Eddie's brown eyes filled with intrigue as they scanned over the shakily-written note that had been slipped into his locker. He folded it tight and shoved it into his pocket. As much as he didn't want to face Richie, he knew that Richie deserved a chance to explain himself.

"Wuh-what's that, Eddie?" Bill asked him, looking over the shorter boy's shoulder.

"Nothing. Just a... homework thing." Eddie lied. He didn't want Bill and Stan to worry about him meeting the same Richie who had made him cry a week ago and follow him there.

"Are you joining us at the quarry after school?" Stan asked. Eddie was thankful he dropped the subject.

"Um, I might be a little late. I have to finish up a project." Eddie hoped he sounded convincing enough.

"Okay, Eddie. Suh-see you th-then." Bill gave him a small smile while Stan raised an eyebrow slightly, as if he could see right through him.

"Yeah, bye guys," Eddie replied quietly, walking past the boys before they could suspect anything further.

***

"Hey, you put the note in?" Beverly nudged Richie who was standing against his locker waiting to meet with his best friend before they left school for the day.

"Yeah, just after lunch," Richie replied, looking away. Beverly's eyebrows furrowed in concern, noticing the tall boy's anxiousness as he tapped his foot and played with his fingers.

"Hey... I'm sure he'll come meet you. He can't hate you forever, Rich. And I'm sure he wants the Losers back as much as we do." Beverly rubbed his shoulder and gave him a sympathetic smile.

"I hope so." Richie gulped. Beverly's sweet words calmed him down a bit - she always knew how to make him feel better.

"Come on, let me walk you there. I'm gonna be meeting Ben at the library after," Beverly explained, grabbing his hand and starting down the hall.

"Nerd alert." Richie jokingly rolled his eyes and pushed his glasses up his nose.

"Hey!" Beverly laughed, elbowing his side.

"Kidding. Y'know... Haystack's pretty lucky to have a girl like you, Bev," Richie admitted, turning to take in the sight of the red-haired beauty. Beverly was undeniably one of the best things that had ever happened to him.

"Thanks, Trashmouth." Beverly let out a small laugh as she held the back door open for Richie as they exited the school and now stood on the cement steps the two would sneak out of class to.

"I gotta go now, but good luck, okay?" Beverly gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and stood on her tiptoes to plant a friendly kiss on Richie's cheek.

"Thanks, Bev." Richie smiled gratefully and pushed a stray strand of her short red hair back behind her ear before saying goodbye.

***

Once the bell rung for dismissal, Eddie walked around to the back of the school to meet Richie. Just the thought of having to face him again made his breathing quicken in worry, causing him to stop and use his inhaler.

But what Eddie saw when he turned the corner of the brick building made him wish he never showed up. He saw a girl hold Richie's hand and kiss his cheek as both of them smiled. Richie pushed a piece of her hair back into place and looked at her with a look of love and admiration. Eddie suddenly felt his throat go dry and an indescribable feeling of jealousy boil inside him.

Eddie's mind flashed to the last time he'd felt this hurt, one year ago. The whole reason he ran crying to Bill and Stan. The whole reason he told them he never wanted to talk to Richie again. The whole reason his heart still hurt every time he saw the boy.

Eddie had shown up to Richie's house uninvited on that summer afternoon, only to see Richie kissing another girl in his bedroom. Richie - his best friend, his favorite person, his crush even - kissing some girl he'd never even told him about.

Eddie couldn't bear to believe that Richie might have had a girlfriend. He couldn't bear to believe that Richie might not like him back, or even like boys. He couldn't bear to see any of what followed, and physically couldn't now that his eyes were brimmed with tears, blurring his vision. He stormed out of the house without a word.

"Eddie! Hey, what's wrong?" Eddie was snapped back into reality by Richie running his way. Richie took a hold of the shorter boy's shoulders, trying to calm him down as he looked aimlessly ahead with tears running down his cheeks.

"Jeez Richie, are you really that dumb? What isn't wrong?" Eddie cried, unable to hide his emotions.

"What are you talking about? Look, whatever I did, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..." Richie apologized, taking hold of Eddie's arm.

"Don't talk to me." Eddie said, pulling away from his grasp.

"Eddie, please, I need you," Richie pleaded, grabbing Eddie's face in his hands and making him look up at him. His big brown eyes Richie remembered being filled with joy were now filled with sadness as a fresh tear fell from his eyelashes. Richie hated that he'd been the one to cause him this pain.

Eddie's breathing hitched as his eyes scanned over Richie's undeniably pretty face. For a second, Eddie wanted to forgive him. He wanted to have Richie back. No, Eddie reminded himself. Falling for him hurt you, and it can happen again.

"Save it for your girlfriend, Tozier. And don't try to follow me, either," Eddie snapped, prying his hands off of his face and walking away without another word.

Richie felt defeated once again as he watched Eddie walk away from him. Questions started to flood his mind. What girlfriend? The only girl he really hung out with was Beverly, and they weren't dating. So then why was he so mad?

Richie's back slid down against the brick wall until he hit the gravel and sat down. He lit a cigarette he'd stuffed in his pocket and allowed his thoughts to drift away with the smoke.

***

"Eddie! Yuh-you're huh-here!" Bill and Stan ran to hug the boy as he arrived at the quarry.

"Wait, are you... crying?" Stan frowned, feeling Eddie hiccup and sniffle against his chest. Eddie replied with a weak nod.

"Oh, Eddie..." Stan led him over to sit down on a rock as Bill rubbed his back.

"Wh-what ha-happened?" Bill questioned after a minute.

"Richie..." Eddie began. Stan and Bill exchanged worried looks as if to say, what did he do to him this time?

"I-I went to go talk to him after school, not work on some project... he was the one who left me the n-note today. But when I got there, I saw another girl kiss h-him," Eddie explained between sobs.

Why would that matter? Stan wondered. Suddenly, it all started to make sense. "Eddie... do you like Richie?" Stan asked.

"That day last year when I came crying to you g-guys... that was when I saw Richie kissing another girl and I was heartbroken. I still feel it when I see him, but I don't think he ever kn-knew I saw. I stopped talking to him after that... I just couldn't stand to see him. It's stupid, but maybe I still do like him. I never stopped."

"I-it's gonna be okay, E-Eddie." Bill tried to comfort him, but wasn't sure himself if there was any way to fix this.