My Love | p.jm | COMPLETED

something

My mother is cooking something for dinner so I rush into the kitchen to help, "It smells good." I force a smile.

She gives me a look, "Why don't you try to work things out with Jimin?"

"Omma, I can't fix something that isn't my fault. He has serious problems-"

knock knock knock...

My mom and I glance over to the front door and sort of sit there for a minute. "Go answer it?" Mom says. I groan and rush over to the door and peek through the peep hole, "Ugh..."

Park Jimin was standing outside in the rain. I grab an umbrella and slip on my rain boots beside the door before going out. I wasn't about to let him inside all soaked and wet, "What do you want?" I ask quickly and slip the umbrella over both of our heads. The humidity is heavy and when we speak you can see our breath. "I'm sorry I was so bad that I made you leave-"

"You slept with someone in our bed! I tried not to say things about you sleeping with other girls outside of our house but when you take one home and she is sleeping on my side- and I walk in to see that... I was done." Tears streamed down my cheeks and dripped onto the flooded sidewalk. There was silence for a while, even the sound of the heavy rain seemed to be drowned out until I spoke up again, "Jimin, was I so bad that you had to find pleasure in other girls?"

"No." He chooses his words carefully as he speaks, "I loved you at first, I really did... But when I hung out with my friends, I did stupid shit... I did really dumb stuff... When I slept with those other women, it wasn't because you didn't pleasure me enough, it was because there was something missing inside of me that seemed to be fulfilling me with them, at least for a night. One night turned into another, and then another and... I couldn't stop. I barely recognized myself and I hardly noticed you anymore... My guilt was built so strongly inside that I brought a girl home... I knew I'd done wrong and I wondered how you stayed with me so maybe, just maybe, if I brought a women home, you'd leave me. I should have done it differently but you loved me so much, more than I could ever ask for... It's been weeks since you left and I haven't even wanted to touch a woman. I know this could never heal what we once had, I'm not expecting it to at least. I just... I had to tell you."

The entire time I cried, remembering the pain he brought to me... Remembering the stress and sadness he gave me. I almost forgot what he had said at the beginning... He loved me once... He really loved me...

"Thank you for telling me this... You could have told me that something wasn't completing you- I would have done more-"

"There was nothing you- or any woman at that- could do. I had my demons and issues." Jimin began to cry. He covered his face with his hands and I could only think of what wasn't completing him. Then it hit me... His mother died a year before we got together... Maybe it was that?

"I just needed something!" He began again, still sobbing. "I thought that you didn't notice at first, that I had begun cheating on you. But we would fight and I knew you knew. I-I just-" He paused for a moment to calm himself. That moment passed and I took him in for a hug. "I just needed something." He whispered into my ear as he pulled me closer. Something...

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