Shooting Stars//revising

;; trying

"I'm trying but you just can't see it"

--

chapter three

n a t h a l i e ' s  p o v

"May date ka na ba Fier?"

"Haays, wala pa nagtatanong sa akin Chelsea, paano na 'yan? Next week na yung Year End!"

"Pare! may date na 'ko!"

Umagang-umaga 'yan na yung iniisip nila. Ang bitter mo lang kasi, wala ka pang date. Bakit kasi nauso pa ang mga ball or stuffs like that? They should be studying for their future. Masaya na 'ko sa pagiging single ko, so no worries.

I opened the door of our classroom and all eyes on me. Wait. Sa akin? People and their criticism. Umupo na lang ako, ayoko kapag tinitingnan ako, nakakainis kasi. As I sat down, nakatingin pa rin sila sa pwesto ko, damn.

"Siya si Nathalie diba?" Come on Nathalie, hindi ikaw ang pinaguusapan nila. Don't be affected. Just focus on sleeping. Don't let them get you Nat.

"Balita raw na mahal niya raw si Ash, diba may Laureen na 'yon?" What the hell? How did they know? Nathalie, easy. Calm down. Just be quiet and pretend you didn't hear a thing.

"Bagay talaga sila ni Ash no? Ang swerte ni Laureen sa kanya! Kyaah" Sila na bagay, sila na. 

"Tatanungin raw siya ni Sha--" Huh? Tiningnan ko sila, yet they looked away. Odd. Pero wait, tatanungin raw ako ni Sha? Who's Sha? Gosh, may gusto sa akin ang isang lesbi? Hell no.

I was surprised that the our teacher is here, so we greeted her and then she greeted back. Homeroom is first, so that means sleeping time for me. Ang boring kasi, kahit sabi ng iba masaya raw dahil parang isa itong free time, pero no. It's boring for me. Really.

"Okay class. Next week on Friday, we will have our Year End. I hope you are ready for it, and oh don't forget to pick your partner" do we really need to have a partner? aiish. 

"Excited na 'ko sa Year End! Gosssh!" they're excited? does it really matter?

"Pare paano ba 'yan! Talo kayo sa pustahan! Hahaha!" may pustahan na pala ngayon? people these days huh.

'You're just bitter that's all' i'm not bitter. Ano naman kung sila na ni Laureen, right? It's not like the end of the world, I'm not gonna cry, I've wasted so many tears for that guy so that's enough. I need to move on. Ewan ko lang kasi kung bakit ang mga tao ngayon, kapag yung mahal nila meron ng iba, iiyak sila hanggang sa ano? balikan siya? Asa! this is reality, bihira na lang kung may mangyayari ngang ganon. 

Na kapag nasaktan na siya, magbabago siya? Bullshit. You don't have to change, you just have to accept and continue. Don't change, dahil kung nagbago ka babalikan ka? Kung nagbago ka ba, mamahalin ka ulit niya? H'wag ka magbago dahil sa ganyan na paraan ka niya nagustuhan at may isang lalaki na minahal ka na ganyan ka-- higit pa.

Hinintay ko matapos yung homeroom hanggang umalis na yung prof. How can I sleep when all of my classmates blabber about this dance? I just can't focus with them, they're noisy.

*ting tong*

"All students, sorry to inform you that we will have a meeting this afternoon so please wait patiently at your seats until all your proffesors are in your classrooms."