I remember the good old days, when smiling was the easiest task I could fulfill, when the challenge was for my friends to try to get me to stop giggling or loving life. Nowadays I can't smile at my friends without my intestines twisting and tearing each other apart trying to wrap themselves more. I can't feel happiness or imagine the good sides of things much anymore; I can only bite my tongue, hold my breath, and wish my life away as I try my best to not let the barriers break releasing everything I've been holding back for what feels like years. When I sit in silence trying my best not to let my tears flow and watch my surroundings first turn blurry, and smeared. Every time I look at my friends gossiping, laughing without a care in the world, with ease and passion, all the jealousy fills my chest and makes me want to puke from how badly I wish it could be me. But, only anxiety and depression will fill its place, I wish things would just slow down or stop completely, I'm barely holding on to the ledge that is called life; I want to let go all the time, I barely make it through the day anymore. Everything slowly falls down on me getting heavier and heavier and others tend to put bricks on top of the stack like its Tetris. I feel as if I'm playing Super Mario, I'm getting hit with every turtle shell that's thrown at me, I'm on my last life.
Just smile, It'll be okay.
You'll be okay.
Everything will be fine.
