Ready Or Not

My Actual Non-Beating Heart

**Daniel**

The next morning was weirdly pleasant, for the most part. And I don’t mean that strictly as “stress free” or “enjoyable” but more like something out of Pleasantville.

We all got dressed and brushed our fangs and packed our briefcases and purses up. Theo’s messenger counts as a purse. He disagrees but he’s wrong. Ratty gray thing covered in Sharpie… pretty sure every scene-girl in high school carried something similar. Lydia does too, when she carries anything at all.

We all walked out of the door together, some of us holding hands (Theo and I), and some of us linking arms (literally all of us, with Anna on my side and Lydia on his). We stayed together as far as we all could before splitting off into the different routes that lead to various workplaces.

I wish I could attribute the walking wall of vampires to our sunny outlook on life and just finding happiness in one another’s company. It was more the need to just be happy and carefree together, and so we played it out that way. Like we hadn’t a care in the world. It was less than lah-dee-dah. Lydia was heading to work with me that morning so we could start on pulling her century’s worth of information together, and we were going to need to stop for breakfast.

Theo came along to make sure Lydia would. She didn't want to, but we'd dumped her blood. She pouted but hunger won, in the end, and she gave in without much fuss. She even cracked a lame joke.

I had to admit, I liked this morning’s pattern and hoped it could become routine. I just felt better when I could see them all at the same time. I was no longer in this just for Theo. I hadn’t been for a very long time. Lydia and Anna were my sisters; they were family, just as dear to me as Melanie. I constantly worried about all of them, lately. Even Anna, who was as likely to break the law as an infant (and I mean that in the kindest way possible), could slip up just by going out to get lunch. This whole thing was sick. I was starting to see why Theo and even Lydia sometimes viewed humans with such distaste.

After we’d grabbed a bite (saying this still cracks me up, internally. Don’t tell Lydia. I still refuse to smile at her vampire puns) at an out of the way subway platform, which is not the most appetizing environment, Theo got on a train going in the wrong direction because he felt the need to see Anna off to work safely. He told her he needed to check and see if one of his favorite up and coming authors had made the “Brave New Voices” display at the library, but we all knew his game. Anna’s face had never looked more pinched than when she literally pushed him off of the train and back onto the platform while calling out that she’d text him.

I shook my head. It was only a matter of time before my best friend and fiance butted heads over his over-protectiveness.

Eventually Theo split off from us, too, leaving Lydia with a peck on the cheek, me with a crushing kiss, and the promise to annoy us with text messages all day. And to sneak pictures of Hannah and send them to Lydia. Lydia smacked his arm for his cruelty, but then smiled in a way that made me think that she knew it was more about keeping it lighthearted. More about pretending things were normal. Maybe I was starting to learn their language.

Then Theo said something about “Baby Judgement” and I realized no one could ever truly understand them. Maybe it’s better that way.

No matter the situation, Theo just being Theo adds a sense of levity to the air. When you put him and Lydia in the same room, we could be (and have been) dumping bodies and laughing our asses off.

Now, with just Lydia and I making our way to my office, I searched for something to say, for some comment to make the stone mask that had taken over her face crack a smile. I could tell she was in her own head too deep; Theo’s pointed out the forehead crease too many times lately.