Since You've Been Gone

It Comes

"I feel like that word shatter." 

-Margeret Atwood

Her head had finally hit the pillow. Six days of hell and one serious case of jet lag and now, at one o'clock in the afternoon, she can finally rest. Of course, it would be Aaron Hotchner that would call her now, of all times. 

She throws her arm out and ungracefully finds her phone amongst the numerous other things on her nightstand. When she recognizes the caller id she rolls her eyes to the heavens but answers the phone anyways. "Hotch, with all due respect sir, this better be really important because I haven't actually slept in about a week and I mean I love you guys. I really, really do but-"

It isn't Hotch's voice that cuts her off. 

"Princess." It's soft and would have been more comforting if she still wasn't trying to wrap her mind around the numerous reasons why Derek Morgan would have Hotch's phone. "Princess? You there?"

She closes her eyes and pushes the thoughts out. Trying on her best-controlled voice she asks, slowly," what happened?"

There's a sad chuckle and a relief rushes over her because if Derek can chuckle than Hotch is not dead. 

Ridiculous, part of her chides. Don't be so naive.

"This morning, during a briefing, Hotch collapsed." 

She has to force herself not to bite out her next question. "Is he... How bad?"

There's a sigh on the other end and the shrill voice of non-other than Penelope Garica voicing her distress. She can distinctly hear her name come out of Derek's mouth before his attention is back on the phone. 

"The EMTs said something about tachycardic and possible internal bleeding. He was breathing though, unresponsive but alive for the most part."

Part of her screams to say something comforting. 'He'll be fine. It takes more than some tachycardia to kill Aaron freaking Hotchner.' She can't force these words out herself because she doesn't believe them.

She doesn't believe he can make it through this one.

"Does Jack know?" 

Jack. He had made it so much harder to leave the states. He had given her these eyes. 

Puppy dog eyes, she recalls. Big brown puppy dog eyes.

"Jessica is gonna pick him up after school, get some ice cream, and tell him then." 

Emily nods and manages to find herself seating up and moving to get her go-bag repacked. "Listen, Derek, I'm gonna take a plane back to the states. I'll be there in... a few hours. If you get any information on Hotch, tell me."

She can almost hear Morgan nodding," yeah, of course, Princess."

She takes a deep breath. This is only the beginning she suspects. The beginning of what she does not know. All she knows is now and that she's going home for the first time since she arrived in London.

"Humans beings have such a weak and foolish existence. They never realize the value of something until it's lost."

- Yoon Seo Hwa