The Love We Shared

E

Guilt. That's all I could feel. I had a whole week to back out of this cockamamie plan. But the day got closer and closer and my heart just didn't get the message. So much so, my heart left my body and organized everything I would need. From my passport to the packing of most of my clothes, plus accessories. All the material things in my life I would need that traitorous blood pumping organ managed to retrieve.

Now the kids were at school, my husband at work and Dylan was parked outside awaiting my presence.

Double checking everything, I determined I was ready. I slowly made my way to the car, taking mental images of my home as I walked by.

I saw it all. The kids running around the house playing tag. The dog covered in mud just trailing behind them like he always seems to do. Jole pausing in front of me with those bright blue eyes staring up at me begging for candy. Caesar's paper airplanes all laid on the floor at the bottom of the stairs as he recreated army fighter jets, sound effects and all.

It was all so hard. Locking the front door behind me, I made my way to the car. I rushed to put my suitcase in the trunk of the taxi before I could get too wet from the rain. Sliding into the backseat, he moved closer to me on the seat before the car had started to move.

"Hi." Dylan gave me his devilishly handsome smile before leaning in.

He smelled like expensive cologne and laundry detergent. Our eyes met before I flicked mine closed when his lips captured me in a kiss. My guilt evaporated right in that moment. I pushed myself closer to him, melting slightly from his affection. Somehow my arms became entangled around his neck, twisting his brown hair in my fingers while his arms wrapped around my waist.

The image of my husband's smile abruptly flashed behind my closed lids and I instantly broke away from the kiss. His innocent green eyes were looking right at me with all the trust in the world. The guilt was back and tight in my throat.

Untangling myself from Dylan, I moved further away to catch my breath.

"Did I do something wrong?" He looked at me with concern.

"No, I did something wrong. Can you take me back to my house? I can't do this."

As if understanding, he only mumbled an okay before instructing the driver. The car pulled up to my house ten minutes later as we sat in the tension-filled silence on the ride back.

"I'm sorry for everything," the words of regret are bitter on my tongue.

"I get it. I'll always remember that brief moment you were mine, if only for a minute."

And that was that. Looking out the window, through the rain, I saw my husband through the big glass windows of our dining room. My eyes captured the flicker of candles and bright red roses, as he must have come home early to surprise me. A single tear ran down the surface of my face, vanishing as soon as I was walking in the rain up my concrete driveway.

Dylan was gone and every Valentine's Day to come would be altered, tainted by this indiscretion. 

~

558 words