I do.

Visit

"You look so pretty in those dress, darling." My mother wanted to buy me some new gowns, so now I am standing here in a light green lace dress. I don't know what she likes about that particular piece of clothing. It makes me more pail than usually. I slowly start to turn around to have a better view of myself.  What I see is nothing extraordinary. A small girl with chocolate hair that contrast with her pail skin. Blue eyes are barely to be seen on her too round face. 

"Mother," I ask quietly. "why do I need new dress? I have some beautiful at home." I focuse on the toes of my shoes and I feel my breath shortening. I've been dying to ask this question for last three hours. Neither my mother nor my older sister, who is already a married woman, have told me a thing. And I need to know. "Mother?" I ask again. She hassitates for a moment with her hands in the air as she was about to put a necklace around my neck. 

"Darling, I am not the one to tell you. At least not on my own." She looks down and my sister comes to her, as if the older lady needed help. "We will talk about it later. I promise. Maybe after dinner, tonight." I am so shocked to see my mother like this. Not knowing what to say. "Good." I nod and let her look at me once more. "I think these are the perfect ones." My sister chnges the conversation topic and leaves so I can take the dress off. "We will buy these dress." My mother announces to the shop keeper as I almost leave the shop. My sister comes to me and she grabs my hand to make me wait a while. "You should be very pleased for what is comming." She whispers. I shiver. Was it a thret?  "Let's go ladies. We have some other things to manage before tea time." Mother comands us and we both start walking down the street. 

Tae time is our family tradition. All my sisters and my mother, and sometimes some of her friends, meet in the tea room and we talk about various topics. Most of my younger sisters were sent to my grandparets at the beginning of the week so today it is only me, my mother and my older sister Caroline. "Vivi, darling, go and make some tea." The houselady asks and I agree. 

I have always loved the process of making tea. I reach for the box of tea and I prepare the kettle. Makig the water boil takes some time but I usually spend it thinking. Just like today. Today I am thinking about the dress. Why would I need new dress? I pour the boiling water into teapot and let it get warm. Then I empty it and sifter with some tea lieves and again pour  hot water over it and let it soak for four minutes. Another time to think. I take the sifter out and put the kettle on a platter. Then I put another kettle with milk and three cups and saucers and a sugar-basin. I am ready to serve the perfect cup of tea. I bring it to the tea room, where my mother andCaroline were waiting. The moment I come they stop talking and my sister looks out of the window, just to avoid my eyes. "The tea is ready." I announce and both women simply nod. 

I come and put the platter on table and take a seat. "Are we expecting somebody?" I ask just to break the silence. "Yes, actually, we are. Could you please bring another cup? A friend of mine is comming." My mother answers and she glances at the clock on the wall. "She is late." I just nod and leave the room. Why have she not mentioned we should have a guest? 

As I head back to the tea room I hear sharp ringing of the door bell and my mother's steps. She goes to open the door. When she comes back, she is followed by a middle-aged woman, slightly older than my mother, and they are lowkey talking to each other. As the visitor steps into the tea room she stares at me and she turns to my mother: "This is her?" "Yes, that is Genevieve." My mother agrees and I feel the cold finger of fear all over my back. "Darling, bring some sweets that you baked earlier." She asks. I rush back to the kitchen and I feel huge relieve. Who is this woman? Why did she look at me like that? I grab some brownies and some sweet cupcakes and bring it to the tea room. Again I take my seat near the window and I stare at our guest. She quietly talks to my mother and Caroline but she keeps glancing at me. Who is she? 

"Genevieve," the lady adresses me, "how good are you in the kitchen?" "I am sorry?" I am shocked. What kind of  a question is this? "I could say she is a great cook. And have you tried these goodies? She baked them." My mother takes the word and saves me from answering. "I asked Genevieve, Minerva!" The lady storms a bit and for the very first time ever I see my mother to obey someone. Well, we could say she obeys my father but that is more about making compromises. Who is this woman really? 

The rest of the visit happens kind of just like this and it is very embarassing. Luckilly, the woman leaves after two hours. I cannot describe the reliefe we all feel. For a while.