Relapse: Hidden Bruises Sequel. (Vhope)

11

(Hoseoks pov) 

I woke up in a white room that was all to familiar to me. It was a hospital. I looked down at myself. Iv drips were plugged into my arms under layers of bandages.

I looked around the room. A heart moniter was sat next to me. A computer and other kinds of electronics were scatterd throughout the room. Next to the bed I was laying on was 4 chairs, 3 with people in them. Taehyung, minji, and jihuan. They were sleeping. I happily sighed. At least I could collects myself so I'll have better acting when they wake up.

I tried to remember how I got here. All I could remember is the blood, shower, and pills. I don't remember anything after that scream. Taehyung must have brought me here, or maybe he called an ambulance.

I looked at the calendar. March 12th. It's spring now, I did that in febuary. How long was I out for...

Suddenly I saw minji twitch. I watched as he slowly blinked his eyes open, and rubbed them with his fists. I was frozen in place, what time was it? Why is he waking up now? I froze when minji saw me.

"Dad?" Minji said softlt. His cute little boy voice was so tired. He probably didn't sleep well. "Are you done sleeping dad?" He asked. I slowly nodded. He stood up from his chair, and crawled up onto the bed and sat next to me. " daddy said you were gonna take a really long nap. Are you well rested now? Daddy said you were stressed out so I hope the nap helped you relaxed. I'm happy your back now so I can talk to you"

I almost cried. He didn't know exactly what happend, but he seemed so worried. I didn't deserve it. But seeming so adorably tired, I just couldn't control my feelings. I let a tear go down my face.

"Dad. Why are you crying? Are you still stressed?" Minji asked cutely. I shook my head.

"No, I'm just happy that I have such a caring child." I said. I smiled.  I was happy even though I knew I didn't deserve it. I let minji under the blankets and he cuddled next to me.

"Dad. Why did they bandage you up like that. Daddy wouldn't tell us"

"You'll know when your older, for now just go to sleep" i said. I felt bad. How did I ever think killing myself would help them. I was just being selfish.  I didn't want to deal with what was going on, so I selfish tried to die. I was just gonna leave them all alone like that. God, everything I do always has something bad about it.

Minji slept in my arms, but I couldn't sleep. Any happiness from before drained out, and i stared blankly at the white wall. I was nothing. No matter what I do, alive or dead, I cause hurt. I make other people sad, and I shouldn't be forgived for it.

That's when I realised it. I'm probably gonna go to inpatient again. Oh god... The memories of her are back again.... I need a drink, I can't get one in the hospital. I was getting more and more anxious. I needed a punishment right now, but unforntionitlydespite how not tired I felt, I fell back into sleep.