letters to my older self | 100 days, 100 letters

04 | dear mistakes

Dear future,

It's difficult, you know? To sit here and interpret what my mistakes can be. Because I can't read the future, and you can't reach me.

But I'll try.

I didn't go to school today. And I hope you remember why. I hope you remember how tiring it used to get for you; in my form— over the weekend. Making it almost impossible to wake up every morning for any other battles.

Battles are not something I am a fan of; so I chicken out- obviously.

God, don't I sound pathetic?

But anyway, I decided to be truant today so that I could study (ideally).

But did I study? You and I both know, no. I didn't. All I did was hold a book in my hand and space out wondering what else I could be doing right now had I not been 'studying'.

Today, one of my favorite YouTubers did a poll on her channel asking about how we feel our week will go. Options included fun, awesome, hard etc.

I don't even remember all the options, my memory is pretty bad. So, I don't expect you to remember any such poll.

Most of the people - more than 50% - said hard.

Why is it so hard for anyone? Shouldn't the things we want to do be easy for us?

Does that mean why aren't doing stuff that we want to?

Why do we choose what others want over what we want over and over again?

When will we learn to choose ourselves?

Maybe I need to change. I need to change and become the right kind of selfish.

Change is important. Because the thing is we are humans, we don't see our mistakes. If we see them, we don't acknowledge them. If we acknowledge them, we don't take the blame on us. If we take the blame on us, we don't do anything about it.

But we need to do something about it.

Change it gives us courage to something about everything.

I hope you don't make the mistake of not changing.

Yours truly,
The Mistaken.