100 || p.jm

9

         "what comes around goes around"
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(HYERIN'S DIARY)
day 20 out of 100

the day i lied to him, the night where we kissed and the night he confessed.
was the day i last saw him.

he never showed up at the coffee shop ever again.

why?

why did i reject him?

because i love him and i didn't want to lose him, my sickness will limit me to live to the fullest with Jimin, and once he will find out if  i accept his love into mine, he will leave me completely.

i still love him.

i cry every night just because i miss him.

i lost 3 important people in my life

2 is not for the good.

1 is for the good.

my parents died, it wasn't for good.
i was the age of 16 that time, my aunt had to take care of me with cruelty.

abusing me every night with all her power,
for no reason or for even one mistake.
for 4 years, everyday i end up crying to sleep.
and so i escaped and strive my own life.

made my own money, food and shelter.

now Jimin has left me but with a lie, painful but it's the only way.

i love you Park Jimin.

i'm full enough with loneliness and emptiness.

i don't belong here, that's why my life is ending early.

i deserve this, ending my life once in for all will stop the pain and pressure in my head emotionally and physically.

no more pressure.
no more expectations that has gone disasterous.

this is what my life is all about, to be ended.

(JIMIN'S P.O.V)

drinking every night with a new set of girls.
getting them dumped on every morning,
can't make me forget about her.

i confessed to her she didn't love me back.

but in her eyes it was a yes, she was trying to hold it in, i know it.

but in her mouth it was a 'no'

i didn't say anything when she said she didn't love me back, i just walked away and left without any goodbyes.

i stopped going to the coffee shop

i avoided her and tried to move on but no use.

the image of her is already in my head.

i need to see her and hug her now, i want to win her heart and do effort to gain her love.

i quitted with getting girls every night and stopped drinking.

i went to her house with flowers and chocolates at 9PM, i knocked and knocked at the door.

but all i can hear was sad music.

i tried opening the door and it was open.

the music was there and i feel like something was wrong.

i heard a cry that was fading so ran up to the sound of the cry, and opened the door.

i saw her unconscious
•
•
•
•
•
her slitted arm bleeding strongly
her wounded and scars full on her legs.
her unconscious body

i ran up to her, carried her to the hospital and waited.

after about 2 hours the doctor came to me and said,

"Sir Jimin"

"yes doc?"

          "what are you with Ms. Hyerin?"

"she's my girlfriend"

         "oh okay, uhm sir uh about her"

             "she's........"

-day 20 ended-