Love is deaf • Meanie

Anything For You

Wonwoo didn't get the job. It was another punch to the gut and he wasn't sure if he wanted to go through anymore. It was really getting to him now, being rejected because of a disability and not a lack of skill was brutal and unfair but there was nothing he could do to change it.

"I just want to fit in, Mingyu. I want to have a job and lots of friends like you but I can't because no one wants me because I'm difficult."

Mingyu shushed him with the warmth of his body as he pulled him close. "I want you and I don't think you're difficult."

"You're the only person in my life that can treat me normal though. I can hear you and you're my only friend. That says a lot about how others see me."

"You being able to hear me has nothing to do with why I stick around. I fell in love with you because you are the most wonderful person I have ever met. Everything we do together makes me so happy. You're not difficult, you're a blessing."

"What happens when you're not around though? If you have to go away for whatever reason. Who do I turn to?" Wonwoo felt lonely even in the arms of his boyfriend. "I don't have Soonyoung anymore and he was my only friend."

"I promise I will never go away. Ever."

Mingyu held him closer (if that was even possible) hoping he could feel the beating of his heart against his cheek. The drumming in his ribcage that spoke a thousand quiet words: this heart beats for you and no one else. The rain that hit heavy on the concrete around them was cold, icy and sore to the skin so Mingyu pulled his coat around his boyfriend because nothing is allowed to harm Wonwoo; not on his watch.

"How would you feel about meeting some new people?" Mingyu asked.

"And get rejected again? No thanks, I'm done being turned down all because of a stupid disability."

"You won't get rejected, Wonwoo. I want you to meet my friends, I trust them."

Wonwoo thought for a second (or sixty). This could be a chance to get his life back on track, meet new people and make friends that cared. It would be nerve wracking and utterly petrifying but if Mingyu trusted them then he should too, right? He thought some more about all that could go wrong; they might look at him funny, not bother to sign and force him to watch them talk. They might even try to avoid him to dodge awkward social interaction. That would be embarrassing. But he's already embarrassed himself enough by taking countless interviews for a job he may never be able to succeed in so why not take another shot in the dark and hope for the best. What has he got to lose?

"Ok." He said almost silently.

"Ok?"

"Ok."

"Ok. Let's get home baby." Mingyu tapped his back in conclusive comfort and their hug broke gently.

"Can we go back to my apartment. I want to paint the walls." A hand thread through his fingers and squeezed tightly.

"Of course. Anything for you."

Wonwoo wanted a garden on his wall. He wanted to see the rustling of the leaves on the trees and the tweeting of the birds in the sky. A wonderful melody of colours to fill his apartment with bright sounds. Wonwoo's mum sent him a photo of her garden in the countryside so far away from Seoul City. It was a sanctuary for him as a child, he loved to sit on the little garden bench and watch the squirrels climb the trees whilst the flowers danced in their beds. He could remember the day he lost his hearing, when he went outside to breath with the wind and he couldn't hear the birds singing. It broke his heart. He had never realised how beautiful the sounds of the garden were until he had lost them for sure and, oh God, it hurt to miss something so orphic and perfect.