Sadda Haq Season 2 (Revised) Script

VI: FITE and the no good, sucky day...

"I ranked 299 when I first came to FITE. Out of 300 students. I was 299 and Sanyu 300. My father owned a reastaurant in Darjeeling. He would always fix things and I would help him. I wanted to learn how to fix things for him, so I studied and found out that mechanical engineering is what I would have to study in order to help him. I came to this place and was forced to change streams. Randhir forced me to. I was pressured, and I caved because I could not handle it. Sanyu ne mera madat kiya. She helped me to change my stream back. We have been friends ever since. I know I am shy. Mujhe language ka problem hai thodi. Hindi itni aachi nahi aata mujhe. I was raised as a happy child. I don't know how to deal with difficult situations or people. Because of that, I was put in the category of mediocre. My first year here, I found love. Jignesh Kamdar. He was part of the reason why I joined the Dream Team. He had encouraged me to, otherwise I was happy learning how to fix machines. Meri duniya Darjeeling mein bahut aachi thi. Vardhan Sir Dream Team ke mentor thi. He was very good, he was harsh, strict, but very knowledgeable. He was our mentor, but perhaps I wasn't a good enough student. I ranked 52 my second year. Sanyukta engagement got fixed and she had to deal with grooming classes alongside second year. I did my best to help her as a friend. That was also the year Parth came to FITE too as a transfer from CITE. She was able to lean on him, and depending more on him than me. Phir bhi theek thi, I had Jignesh, but things began getting complicated between us. I was encouraged to look after him instead of my studies. He became a bit possessive and I wanted to seek help. Unfortunately, there was no one. No one but Yoyo. I went to Vardhan Sir, but was told that my problems were mediocre (was not shown in the show. This is Kaustuki's POV). He wanted his students to have passion for engineering. But when the passion begins to fade and a student needs help to hang on to anything to retain that passion, I looked to my mentor to help me do that. But the truth is, that I could never actually be a student Vardhan Sir would want to mentor. He yelled and screamed and what others took as motivation, I took as demotivation. I wasn't the smartest student, nor the most hard-working. My goals were to help my dad and family. I am an only child. Raised by loving parents who made their own world. We lived in a bubble. A happy content bubble. And then, that bubble shattered. I was called back home. I had nearly completed 3rd year, all that was left were my exams, but I was not able to take them. I asked Vardhan Sir to do something, but he didn't because he didn't believe in exams. Yoyo and Sanyu tried but they weren't able to get permission. So I stayed at home. I watched my mother fight cancer and lose. I saw her wither away. I saw my father disintegrating bit by bit. I saw the machines in our restauraunt piling up because dad stopped fixing them. I felt the happiness of our bubble slowly drift away as I stood by unable to do anything. Six months ago today, my mother stopped reconizing my face. She had no idea I was her daughter. I stopped receiving calls from friends, never once did my mentor check in. My world imploded and no one knew. 4 months ago my dad sold the restaurant to pay for mom's expenses. The restaurant I was suppose to work in after my degree was no longer ours. I began working small jobs here and there fixing small appliances and machines to compensate. Dad couldn't get the strength to leave mom alone in the hospital, so I began working. As she succumbed to cancer, my father succumbed to her loss. A week after mom passed away, dad did too. My house was no longer a home. My town of Darjeeling was no longer familiar to me. All I had were a half set of engineering skills and my parent's dream to say that their daughter was an engineer. That is why I am here. I am back to complete my degree. I refuse to be another statistic where a girl cannot finish her degree and has therefore wasted a boy's seat. I am here for my parents. But mostly, I am here for me because there is nothing else for me. All I have is engineering. And I need a mentor who will believe in me. Who will yell at me when needed, but also be my guidance because I feel very lost and alone right now. I feel like I am barely hanging on. I need someone to believe me worthy. Because I don't. But I want to feel worthy, I want to be worthy. If you step up, I will too. I can promise you that I will never let you think that you wasted your time on me. I will value this relationship of Guru-Shishya above all else because that is what I have been taught by my parents: to value relationships. But I need someone to have my best interest at heart, because right now... I feel like I am the only one who does and it's a very lonely feeling." She let out a breath and looked down at her hands. Never had she been so vulnerable, but at this point, things could not get any worse according to her, so she continued. "People have this image of me in their head. Sanyu, Parth, Nikhil, Chandan, perhaps even you. But I am no longer the Kaustuki I was when I started here. I want to be...but I'm..." she breathed out and shrug her shoulders "...I don't know... I don't know who or what I am anymore. All I know is that I owe this to myself and my parents. But I need help" she ended.