Lotus amidst the Mud [Completed]

The Downfall

The physical weakness and starvation takes me back to yesteryears.

... In a society where men ruled the households, a Devadasi could compete daringly with men on many issues.   It was one such incident that landed me in trouble.

After British invasion, the temples lost their patronage; so did we Devdasis.    The entire Devdasi lane, which was once thronged with Kings and others from the high society, were now vacant and isolated.

It is when the High Priests of the temples started to play their games.   That day, the High Priest told me that women are weaker and submissive to physical pleasure more than men.   I argued that Devadasis would not have been born otherwise.   To prove his point, the priest made undue physical advances towards me and I slapped him hard.

When the High Priest heard there is a British General staying at Zamindar's residence, he had a plan.   He made Zamindar invite me to do a special performance for his guest.   For him, I was just another "performer".   Totally drunk, the foreigner started touching me obscenely during my performance.   When I requested Zamindar for protection, he stated that denying a guest's wish is sin.

Left alone, two senior Devadasis tried to rescue me from the foreigner.     In his inebriation, he deformed their face like mughals did to temple statues.   He started ravishing another Devadasi.   The Zamindar remained a mute spectator to the atrocity.

Next day, I was kidnapped and taken to the Military Hospital for venereal disease check-up.      In the name of examination, I was touched and tortured in places where nobody had dared to. Since virgins were served to men in higher ranks, I was brought to the General's room.

I kicked him hard where it would hurt most.   The General in pain ordered his soldiers to tie me to the bed and ran hot iron blades on my feet.   While I screamed in pain, he mocked that a "Nautch Girl" can perform a dance "horizontally" also, in tune with his body, on his bed.     He raped and tortured me throughout the night.   He asked me to sing his name in his ears.     A Devdasi, who sang only the praise of the Divine, was asked to repeat a mortal's name in physical ecstasy...

It is a man's moral responsibility to protect a woman's modesty.   Even a mortal takes wedding Saptapadi vows to protect his wife.      I was married to Lord Almighty with thousand arms, each arm wielding different weapons and shields...   And yet, Neither HE nor his THOUSAND CELESTIAL WEAPONS offered protection, when I was repeatedly assaulted.

After he was finished with me, he despatched me to the Military Brothel.

While Prostitutes perform certain moves to seduce the mortals, Devdasis are supposed to perform divine dance to appease the Supreme Spirits.    Prostitutes display their body as art and Devdasis demonstrate Art through their mind and body.   Our job was for a higher purpose - to make Bhakti, 64 types of arts and skills prosper in our nation.

AND NOW... There was no difference in definition under the British rule.